I'm sure we are all familiar with the film "Wolf of Wall Street" (and if you're not... become familiar with the best movie of all time). Jordan Belfort, played by Leonardo Decaprio, is in fact a real person (and my role model). Although the film is not entirely accurate, these are some of the moments when we really wanted to be Jordan Belfort.
1. When he threw fun coupons off his yacht.
If only we could all throw money off of yachts and refer to the dollar bills as "fun coupons."
2. When he showed off his killer dance moves that we all wish we were capable of replicating.
Let's be real, no one killed it at their wedding like he did.
3. When he made hundreds of dollars from conning a rich idiot.
If only making money was truly this easy, but then again, I don't understand stocks at all.
4. When he had a yacht party with his best friends.
Yeah, because every weekend, I just party with my friends on my yacht.
5. When he literally threw away money because he was so rich.
You mean you don't have money just lying around that you can throw away because you don't need those hundred dollar bills?
6. When he married literally the hottest duchess in the world.
The duchess of Bay Ridge...and then Jordan went on to buy a yacht and named it after her! Can you say relationship goals?
7. When he walked into a room and hundreds of people cheered for him because, hey, he's Jordan Belfort.
I can only wish to someday walk into a room and have people cheer for me at my sheer presence. Even when I don't do anything, I just stand there... I want to hear people cheering for me and my greatness.
8. When he threw a glass on the ground and shattered it because he has enough glasses to keep him satisfied for life.
Who needs a dishwasher when you can just throw your glasses into bushes and buy new ones every week?
9. When he was able to say this because he made a lot of money but not ENOUGH money.
Wouldn't life be great if we were all just 3 shy of a million a week? That's about what I make ... in the span of five or so years (maybe).
10. When he and his friends spent $40,000 on lunch and got away with it because they said this.
Yeah, I also spend $40,000 every time I go out to lunch because I have money lying around to spend on just mashed potatoes.
"Wolf of Wall Street" is a fabulous movie that truly outlines the goals that I want to achieve in my life. But as much as I want to be Jordan Belfort, I will never bring myself to understand stocks or Wall Street. Maybe I'll just settle for marrying a Jordan Belfort and getting a yacht named after me.
