Having the opportunity to leave home for college or work and finding out how much you've been missing out has its ups and downs. I’ve met great people from all around the world, I’ve learned from professors with all sorts of belief systems and weird theories, and I’ve discovered my insatiable hunger for traveling and learning. Getting used to living by myself in a completely different city than the one I was raised in has helped me internalize all this new information. Because of this, I’ve found myself thinking a lot about who I am, where I am going, who I want to be, what I like, and the most famous -and dreaded- question you can ask a twenty-something: “Where do you see yourself in [insert amount] years?”
My overall quarter-life existential crisis over any topic has taken over to the point where I keep wondering if this is true for every person my age. After doing a lot of thinking, I’ve come to the conclusion that there must be a series of common thoughts or questions on aspects of our lives that I am sure, every twenty-something around the world must have. I mean, don’t you sometimes wonder if there is a school like Hogwarts near your hometown that you could attend to? No? Sorry, my bad.
Anyway, here is my –not so- definitive list of thoughts every twenty-something must’ve had at some point:
1. What’s with the whole “work experience required” when applying for jobs? Is it something that I am magically supposed to possess as soon as I graduate? Was it distributed in some liberal arts class that I was too lazy to take? In what time exactly, with credit-packed, full-time semesters was I supposed to become regional manager of something? (I’m currently watching The Office, so...)
2. Is it okay to feel scared of anything and everything? Sometimes it’s like every small move, no matter in what direction, feels extreme and risky. Of course, then my reasonable internal voice kicks in, telling me “you’re only 24. Even if you do make mistakes, you probably have the rest of your life to fix them”. But still.
3. So what is it, then: do we follow our dreams or do we make a living? Why is it so hard to make these two things coincide?! And another good one: what is my dream? Sometimes we are flooded with so many –realistic and unrealistic- ideas that it is hard to pinpoint what is the absolute thing we would like to accomplish in life. In my own experience, brainstorming and making lists has been very helpful. Of course, sometimes you write some things that you’ll then regret, but whatever. You can always burn your notepad later.
4. What is up with insurance policies and tax forms??? Nope, don’t get it, feels like I never will. Let’s move on.
5. Is her/his life really that cool? Does she/he really get to travel the world that much? And have the perfect job at the same time? And the perfect “Live. Laugh. Love”-captioned picture on Instagram? Probably not. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that we post the things we want other people to see. We all do it. Some people just invest more time in it, and that is okay.
6. Why does it feel like everybody else is more accomplished than me? Some of them might be, some of them might not. That doesn’t mean I can’t get there, right? All of us choose different lifestyles and career paths and some take more time than others. Even finding what you like to do might take more time for you than for your friends. I am one of those people, and I still don’t regret having changed my major a few years in. I needed to know what I didn’t like first.
7. ANOTHER social media/networking/shopping app?! We have enough usernames and passwords to remember as it is! No more - Oh look! Snapbookgram! Sign up? Yes.
8. Yay! Another friend is getting engaged and/or having a baby. I still eat peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon for lunch, that's just me, I guess. But you know what? Most twenty-somethings in the 21st century have the luxury of choosing when to take these giant steps, and some of us want to get a few things out of the way first. There is no right way to make these personal decisions. Meanwhile, we can party at their weddings and babysit their cute babies!
9. How long can I go without checking my bank account? Maybe I can just go through life doing my thing and the cashier will let me know if my card has been declined! Sounds like a good idea. Or I can also sell all of my possessions, since I'll probably won't make it until the end of the month.
10. Will I have my stuff figured out someday? I don't even think real adults have their stuff figured out yet. Wait, am I considered a real adult now?
Whether you find out what your dream is or you learn how to fill out your tax forms in ten years, it is all part of the journey. Maybe we are supposed to feel this uneasy and uncomfortable all the time just so we can try new things. Maybe we are supposed to feel like everyone else is more accomplished so we can have that healthy dose of motivation and drive to achieve our goals. Conquering our fears and insecurities will always be a challenge, no matter if we are 24 or 84. For now, let's not worry about the answers to all of these questions; let's embrace the uncertainty and acknowledge that everything leads to something else. Everything is a process and we are all works in progress. What is important is to keep moving forward!
And just so we can laugh about our insecurities together, what other thoughts/questions do you, as a twenty-something, struggle with? Comment below, you are probably not alone.
