As someone who is Jew(ish), you won't find me keeping kosher or going to Temple every Friday night and Saturday morning. However, there are some things that even someone as unreligious as me knows to be true.
1. Everyone knows everyone.
This is the Jewish geography we all know so well. If you are Jewish, you're bound to meet your mother's ex boyfriend from high school's cousin's sister's boss, and become best friends.
2. Jewish camps are the best.
Whether it be day camp or sleep away camp, some of our fondest memories include spending hot summer days at our camps, with some of our best friends. We live 10 months for two, and can't wait to go back every year!
3. Hebrew school days were the worst days.
No one likes being cooped inside for a few hours every week, for the purpose of Hebrew School. I'll leave it at that.
4. You never leave Grandma's house hungry
Even after a multi-course meal, you know Grandma will send you home with plenty of leftovers
5. . Some food is amazing, whereas some...isn't.
While I could eat latkes and hamantaschen for every holiday, I wouldn't mind if a few things got taken off the menu every year (chopped liver and gefilte fish, I'm looking at you)
6. Your friends ask you if Hanukkah is the same as Christmas.
I mean, yeah, if you take away the whole Christmas tree, Jesus, presents on the 25th thing. Oh, and add 8 nights of Hanukkah and a menorah. Totally the same.
7. Bar and Bat Mitzvahs were the best day of the week.
Saturdays in 6th-7th grade were lit (quite literally, because of glow sticks and light-up rings). Anyone who was anyone sported mismatched socks while dancing, accessories from the DJ stand, and the next monday wore merchandise collected from the various parties.
8. There are too many holidays to count.
Didn't we just have one? No? I missed two? Oh.
9. You still aren't sure which is the "right" spelling of Hanukkah.
...Chanukkah? Chanukah? Hanukkah? Chanukkiah? The world may never know, or may never come to a consensus at least.
10. You may or may have not ruined the Easter Bunny and Santa for your friends.
Me, age 6: "So Santa and the Easter bunny aren't real?"
Mom: Nope, it is your friend's mom and dad. Don't tell them that, though!"
Me: *proceeds to tell friend*. Oops.
