10 Things I've Learned From Moving In

10 Things I've Learned From Moving In

What is it really like moving in together?

"It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along."

Once we fall in love with someone, and I mean truly fall in love with them - it's hard to not imagine what your future together might look like. Something that I have always firmly believed in is that you need to live with someone first before even thinking about marriage. My boyfriend and I waited until I graduated college to live together, and even then we had to wait an additional six months since I had taken a position to live and work in the smoky mountains (best experience ever). Now by this time we had been dating for just a little over two years, so we were very eager to have our own place together. We went through a decent amount of phases in those first two years from: living on the same college campus, to him living off-campus (only five minutes away), to him moving two hours away for a full-time job, to me moving four hours away for my six month position, to now finally living together. It was a roller coaster to say the least.

I was very excited for us to finally move in together, but I found that my perception of what it would be like was very glamorized. Essentially I went into it thinking it would be all fun all the time, or as all the tumblr posts refer to it, "a never ending sleepover with your best friend". In living together I've found that we truly enjoy each other's company, so it is fun most of the time, but there are other times where it's not all so "happy-go-lucky". I constantly see posts on Instagram and Facebook about how girls can't wait to move in with their significant other because they have all of these plans, and they imagine how fun it will be to cook together, do laundry together, and have so much fun being domestic together - and all I have to say to that is just no. We try to paint this picture that everything will be perfect and great all the time, but one of the toughest things we need to accept is that we are all human, and we are messy and emotional beings that are prone to making mistakes or simply, not being perfect all the time. So, I thought I'd share some lessons I've learned in moving in and living with my significant other!

1. You're not going to wake up every morning and have breakfast together. Honestly, you'll be lucky if you have more than five minutes of conversation in the morning between the both of you (or maybe just you) running around to get ready on time.

2. You will fight over the very stupid, little things that you once promised each other you never would. But in all seriousness, is it really that hard to put your pants in the laundry basket instead of on the floor....right next to it.......

3. You won't always have dinner together because odds are that your schedules won't always be in sync.

4. Movie night isn't some adorable night filled with popcorn and pillow forts and cuddling. You don't even really have time to watch movies anymore, unless it's a Friday night, but odds are you're already exhausted and want to go to bed by 9pm. Exception would be if you're binge-watching Stranger Things on Netflix, because you can both definitely stay up for that.

5. You will find things about each other that you don't like, or that you never thought would bother you and that's okay! Like I said, no one is perfect.

6. You're going to see them for who they really are, and they're going to see the sides of you that you don't want them to see. This is really important - because this needs to happen if your relationship is really going to work. You need to see each other mad, let them see you when you cry, watch them as they handle stressful situations, see each other at your weakest.

7. You can't run away or walk out when you're fighting. You live together now, the furthest you can go is the next room - unless you want to be really dramatic and get in your car and drive somewhere, but I strongly advise against that. You'll learn you can't run away from your problems (literally).

8. It's not always romantic all the time, but you'll find peace in being able to be comfortable around them.

9. They're going to see you without your makeup and hair all done up, and they're still going to love you. They'll show you that you have no reason to feel insecure with yourself.

10. Most importantly, through the ups and downs of living together, I've learned that yeah, we're going to make it, and life together is pretty great.

Keep all of these in mind when you imagine what it will be like living together, because odds are that it will be harder than you think - but definitely worth it. Plus like I said, if you really enjoy each other, it really is fun most of the time!

Cover Image Credit: Lindsey Bijas

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Just Because I Check My Boyfriend's Location Every Hour Doesn't Make Me A 'Psycho Girlfriend'

No, checking his location every hour does not make me psycho.

My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for a few months now. He has come up with describing my actions sometimes as “psycho girlfriend.” As much as this bothered me at first I started to realize there is nothing wrong with my “psycho” actions.

I don’t monitor who my boyfriend hangs out with and I don’t care who he texts, I trust him, but I do watch other things he does.

I probably check his location about once an hour, maybe more if he isn’t texting me back.

This isn’t some way for me to find out if he is with another girl, it’s so I can ensure he isn’t dead in a ditch somewhere. If he was on Snapchat five minutes ago but hasn’t texted me back in 45 minutes, yeah I’ll call him out on it but I'm not actually mad. If he is with friends and not answering me, it’s cool. I just want to be able to make sure I know where he is and that he is alive on a regular basis.

I make him keep his read receipts on for me.

I don’t care if he leaves me on read, I just need to know he is seeing what I’m saying. Half the time, I text him random facts or thoughts I have throughout my day, those don’t always need a response back. However, I do want to know he is acknowledging me through reading my texts.

Yes, from time to time I will spam him and make him respond to my messages so we can make plans or I can know what he is doing with his day but it’s not like I plan out his every move for him or care if he is getting drunk with the boys on a Wednesday, not my issue.

I don’t ask for all of his time or anything. I know he is a busy person. All I ask for him to text me back on a regular basis (once an hour to be exact), for him to allow for me to know where he is at all times and to get one night a week with him.

I don’t plan to show up where he is or anything, I simply just like to know information and get a weekly time with him. I don’t care if I only see him that one night a week, I just want one night with a movie or dinner or snuggles so I can get my boyfriend time.

The rest of the time he is his own person, and I couldn’t really care less about what he does in that time.

Cover Image Credit: Grace Wilkowski

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From The Girl Who's Going Through The Unknown Trials And Tribulations Of Being Newly Single

Being newly single can be hard, for reasons that don't incorporate your ex

SO, I just got out of a THREE YEAR RELATIONSHIP and things have been a challenge and a half. Not for the reasons you may think because if we are being completely honest and cruel, I have no emotion towards the ghost of this mans past but that’s beside the point. My problems lie where people least expect since according to everyone that hasn’t been in an aggressively long relationship, this is my time to go crazy and glow up.


I am expected to suddenly master the single lifestyle and become Kim Kardashian in the span of literally two months. But this is simply not the case, and I’m sure most newly single ~ladies~ can relate.

I literally have no idea how to be a single human. I mean, I’m fine by myself, I actually prefer being by myself, but how does one flirt? Find dates to formal? Just be a normal, single woman? I am confused, and I think I will remain confused for a long while.

This past week, I tried to FEED A MAN A CHIP FROM MY FANNY PACK while at a party because in my mind, that was normal, flirtatious activity. Not only did I try to shove food down a man's throat, but I was also wearing a fanny pack. I have so many questions for myself that will most likely be answered with time, but until then, I will continue, through trial and error, to figure out the art of being #single.

I also really dislike the hype of “glowing up” post-relationship because that takes TIME. Every girl that has been in a four-day relationship takes to Twitter or Instagram to show their dramatic (and immediate) post break up, glow up. WELL, let me tell you something.

This is not the case for those of us who were in it for the long haul. I AM STILL TRYING TO FIGURE MY ISH OUT, I DON’T HAVE TIME TO BODY BUILD AND MASTER MY SKINCARE ROUTINE. I’m still trying to figure myself out because this is the first time in three years that I have been completely alone with myself for this long.

I’m working on an internal glow up and succeeding too, which is why the world needs to GET OFF MY BACK. Hopefully, this summer will be the season of external change but until then, plz don’t expect much :-).

SO, basically, the point of this article was to try to explain that being newly single can be hard for reasons that don’t incorporate your ex-man's, because to be honest, getting over them can sometimes be the easiest part if the breakup has been long past due.

The hardest part lies in trying to figure out who you actually are without someone directly related to your identity. I still have people from my hometown asking me how he is and what he’s up to, and TBH, I have no clue, but I can assure them that Frankie is doing just fine.

Cover Image Credit: Instagram

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