They've got nothing to give but love and support. But who wants that anyway? Here is a short list of reasons why Dogs are not as great as you think.
1. I hate their cute face.
Way to go, dog. Now I can't look at anything else because nothing is nearly as distracting as your adorable furry face.
2. I hate that they like to cuddle.
Nevermind the warmth and love that comes out of cuddling. Who doesn't like to feel cold on the outside and the inside? I'll keep my ice cold heart too, thank you very much.
3. I hate how comforting they are.
Their presence gives you the feeling of safety and comfort. Clearly even Vladimir Putin hates the comfort he receives from this canine.
4. I hate when they greet you at the door.
They jump and they wag their tail because they're happy to see you after a long day. So annoying.
5. I hate that they want to be with you all the time.
They trail after you no matter where you go, even when they can't always get there. Stop following me around, dog. You know I don't like being admired and loved.
6. I hate that they're patient with you.
Who likes patience any way? I know a lot of people who wouldn't be mad if I forced them to dress up in my little brother's old baby clothes.
7. I hate having a right hand man.
Dogs help you with your chores? No thanks. Dogs help you with cooking? No thanks. Who needs a little help every now and then? Definitely not me.
8. I hate when they're there for you when you're down.
It's so annoying when dogs are there to console you on your bad days. Leave me alone, dog. Let me lay in bed and wallow in self-pity.
9. I hate how protective they are.
They guard you, they do whatever they can to keep you safe from harm's way, even if that means risking their lives and their own safety. Darn!
10. I hate when they love you unconditionally.
Nevermind the movie "Hatchi." Nevermind dogs who cry and mourn for their owners at their grave for days at a time. Their whole life revolves around you -- they live their life doing everything they can to make you happy. It's the worst!!
All laughs and jokes aside, I truly am convinced that dogs are God's gift from Heaven. My dog has taught me about patience, loyalty, and love so much more than I would ever expect. He gives me a sense of belonging, warmth, and security. I love my dog not just because he's my best friend, but also because he is the best gift I have ever had. My dog thinks the world of me, he looks up to me like I'm the greatest person in the world; and honestly, I could only ever hope that one day, I can be half the person he thinks that I am.