For those of us who are on the younger side, as the weather gets colder, we joke that it’s cuffing season. Well, in the mid to late 20s world, fall and winter become this more intense version of cuffing season called engagement season where the cuff is on the fourth finger on your left hand and not at all metaphorical. Also, you’re agreeing to bind yourself to someone for life and not just until you can comfortably wear shorts again.

A huge part of this ritual of engagement is getting to go shopping for what may be the most expensive and most white dress you may ever wear, and that’s where I come in.

If you have a third-cousin or distant elementary school friend who recently participated in this special time of year, send them the link to this article. Or if you’re getting engaged yourself, please read on to get the answers to all the most common questions I got in my time as your personal fairy godmother.

1. No, our job is not exactly like "Say Yes to the Dress"

Long before my time as a bridal consultant, I admit that I was a huge fan of “Say Yes.” All of the bridal consultants seemed so glamorous with their sleek black attire and their fresh dose of sass. The reality though is that I worked eight-hour days (all eight of which I spend on my feet, so I only knew one person in the entire store that wore heels regularly) and on my lunch break, I was still updating my last bride’s profile while eating some type of microwaveable meal.

2. Trust your bridal consultant. This is not their first rodeo.

In fact, if you’re a newbie, chances are you won’t be selling bridal at all. In my first couple months of working at my store, I worked exclusively with bridal party (mother of the bride, bridesmaids, etc.), prom and special occasion. If you’re working with a true bridal consultant, they are some of the most experienced people in the store, so - take a deep breath - you’re in pretty knowledgeable hands.

3. Try to come in during a weekday or early/late in the day if at all possible.

This is when stores are typically the least busy. This makes it easier to bring all your closest fashion advisors and to have the most attention dedicated to you by your stylist. You can also ask the person on the phone how busy they will typically be at that time and plan accordingly. My number one comment on the weekends was how hectic the store was, and I can confirm that sometimes I was split between four different groups. It comes with the territory.

4. If you want your dream dress, you need to have your wedding dress ordered nine (yes, NINE) months before the wedding.

Consider this dress your baby. You wouldn’t rush the pregnancy process, so please don’t rush the wedding dress process. I’m not saying you can’t find a beautiful dress for your wedding in a shorter time period, because that was a regular part of my job. What I am saying though, is that if you want the most selection and time to have it steamed and tailored to you perfectly sans rush fee, you need to come in early. Also, your bridesmaids need to order their dresses about six months early. If you take one thing from this list PLEASE let it be this.

5. Have at least a good idea of what you’re looking for by your appointment.

If you are an exceptional bridal stylist, you are probably blessed with some kind of psychic ability, but a good plan beats telepathy any day. Here’s some good questions to get you started in the right direction: What styles of dresses do I like on myself on a daily basis? Do I want to wear lace at my wedding? What kind of vibe am I going for on my big day? Your stylist will love your forethought.

6. By the way, there is no “back” where we hide dresses in your size.

A small sampling of some of the clothes that we hide "in the back."

This is becoming increasingly popular for retail stores where we only have stock of what you see on the floor. I could get into the details about how we work on a showroom model with dress orders from clients being our main way of getting new stock, but the point is that as much as I would love to sell you this dress, I can’t because we don’t have it – at least not in my store. Here’s what we actually have in the back: a stylist sneaking in a snack between clients, our order pick-up rack, and a small mountain of boxes holding promotional items. That’s it.

7. I'm not judging your body. Additionally: Our sizes run small.

Petite or tall, curvier or more athletic, with a little more to love or a more compact firecracker – I’ve seen it all. All I care about is getting you in a dress that you can see yourself walking down the aisle in.

Also, the sizes are European and run small. I measure six dress sizes up than what I typically wear according to our size charts. Don’t buy into the pressure to lose weight before your wedding due to a dress size. Obviously somebody loved you enough that they thought you were the best they were ever going to get exactly as you are now, so don’t get to hung up on the number on the tag because it literally means nothing. That being said, if you want to lose weight for you, I will support you.

8. If I put anything on hold for you, it was because I liked you. If I spent longer than an hour and a half with you, it was also because I liked you.

I had some pretty lenient managers, but the code is clear: appointments are timed and if it’s a busy season, you don’t put things on hold. In my store, commission was done on an hourly basis, so time really is money. I also really mean it when I say that the dress you love in your size could be gone within the next hour. I’ve seen it happen and it’s devastating. So if I did either of those things for you, I was doing you a huge favor. Don’t abuse this power.

9. Bring your shoes plus all your underthings for the big day to alterations.

Unless you're getting married barefoot, do not come barefoot. You may step on some loose pins on the ground.

This is a little nod to all of the incredible people who worked in the alterations department. These people really want to get the right fit for you and can do amazing work to make the dress look like it was made for you. However, for your skirt to hit the dance floor perfectly for your first dance and for your strapless dress not to fall down all night, you need to come in with all your accessories.

10. We really are happy for you.

Outside of the unexpected perks like great biceps from carrying heavy garment bags and the occasional manager-sponsored lunch, the best moment in this job is seeing you light up or cry or both when you decide on your wedding dress. It’s an emotional moment for you and a special one for us. It means we did our job right and that all of the work we put into finding you The One was worth it… Of course, the commission doesn’t hurt either.