Look, I love Harry Potter as much as anyone. Probably more, in fact. And it is that qualification that allows me to write this article. Let’s face it, the most iconic series of the 90s and 2000s kids’ childhoods is not without faults.
Yes, the series taught us some amazing lessons about love, bravery, sacrifice, and believing in ourselves. But, after you read this, maybe you’ll agree that some parts of the story made absolutely no sense.
1. Ron and Hermione.
I’m going to start out with a bang. Look, Ron is too absentminded and clueless to date the fierce, intelligent, driven woman that is Hermione Granger. Even J.K. Rowling herself said she regrets putting them together in the end. Hermione needs a flame as bright as her own, and while Ron is great in his own way, he’s too dim. He never would've been able to make her happy.
2. Why Hermione was given a time turner in Prisoner of Azkaban.
Sure, let’s put all of the past and future into the hands of a 13-year-old just because she wants to take some extra classes. No! Time is a delicate concept, and one small mistake could alter the fates of all of humanity. I don’t care how smart and ambitious Hermione is; the girl is barely a teen. Not to mention that credit hour limits exist for a reason, and I would worry about her sanity while trying to finish all of her assignments. There was just no justification for giving Hermione that responsibility.
3. How Barty Crouch Jr. was able to masquerade as Mad-Eye Moody for so long.
In the very first scene where we meet “Mad-Eye,” the sky in the great hall ceiling starts to storm. This might not have been as noticeable in the movies as in the books, but that alone set off warning bells. Then, while every student and professor’s eyes are on him, he whips out a suspicious vial and takes a huge gulp.
Now, I have no problem with someone wanting to stay hydrated. Water intake is very important. However, everywhere he goes, he drinks out of this little vial like his life depends on it. Sure, my first thought wasn’t “that’s polyjuice potion” (I was leaning more towards alcoholism). But, either way, his actions were certainly suspicious enough for another faculty member to investigate. The second they looked into it, he would've been busted. In addition, let’s not forget a lot of the characters at Hogwarts have known Mad-Eye for years. There’s no way they wouldn't have not noticed the changes in his personality. I’m not buying that Barty Jr. was able to mimic and anticipate Mad Eye's every move.
4. When Harry named his son after Albus and Severus, claiming they were the bravest men he knew, while completely ignoring the fact that Ron sacrificed his life in human chess as an 11-year-old within a year of meeting Harry.
First off, Severus Snape is a bad human being and I will never change my mind about that. Second, Ron was only eleven when he casually sacrificed his life so Harry could stop Snape from getting the Sorcerer’s Stone. And, he did that for Harry and the sake of the world. Snape only “protected” Harry so that he could prove his love for Lily. Sorry, but that’s just not “bravest man” worthy. Albus Ron Potter is hands down a better choice.
5. How Muggles never discovered magic.
This one is truly baffling. There are so many obvious displays of magic throughout the series that the muggles in Harry Potter world are either blind or stupidly oblivious. Let’s just think back for a moment. All of the flying cars, brooms, and motorcycles were not casual in any way. The wizards flew them next to cruise ships, down highways, and Ron was even seen flying a car over the city in the second movie. And let’s not forget about how The Order of the Phoenix’s headquarters was an entire townhouse that appeared and disappeared on command. I don’t know about you, but I think I would notice if I lived in the third door down one day and the fourth door the next. As the books went on, there were more and more signs. Voldemort wreaked havoc all over Britain with no regard to secrecy. Skulls floating in the sky and mysterious deaths and assembling an army of giants? Someone would've noticed.
6. Why no one bothered to give Harry extra training.
Dumbledore knew all along that Harry would have to be the one to defeat Voldemort in battle. I understand why he hid the fact that Harry was a Horcrux until the last minute; Harry’s home life and bullying were already traumatic and adding that in may have sent him into a spiraling depression. But it is borderline neglect not to prep Harry for his fate. Harry clearly had the gifts to be a powerful wizard; he produced an impressive Patronus as a 13-year-old. However, he was only a mediocre student. I can’t recall a movie where he doesn’t use expelliarmus in battle. A teenager who only knows one spell up against one of the most powerful wizards in history? It’s a miracle Harry defeated Voldemort in the final film (that alone could make this list), and it’s downright mind-blowing that Dumbledore never saw fit to take on Harry as his own protege.
7. Why everyone just let Harry compete in the tri-wizard tournament.
The ministry clearly stated that the minimum age for competing was 17 years old. They forbade anyone under the age from entering and created multiple layers of protection to ensure it didn't happen. Yet, five minutes of arguing after the Goblet of Fire spits out Harry’s name, everyone simply accepts that Harry must compete. But why? Clearly something dark and sophisticated happened to the goblet. Why would anyone think that allowing Harry to go along with whatever malicious intents sent him into the tournament, which everyone also agrees is above his skill set, is a good idea? Offering him up as bait, as McGonagall astutely puts it, is unethical and a reckless way to get to the cusp of things.
8. Why Hermione isn’t a Ravenclaw.
I understand that Hermione needed to be a Gryffindor to progress the storyline. However, Ravenclaw honors knowledge above all else, while Gryffindor honors bravery. While I agree that Hermione is brave and awesome in every way, it is no secret that she, too, holds knowledge to the highest regard. She is the “brightest witch” of her time, but she isn’t in Ravenclaw? Sorry, I’m not buying it.
9. What do all the adult wizards do in the world?
Apart from working in the ministry of magic and hunting dark wizards, what exactly do wizards do? In the sixth movie, everyone is confused when Hermione states her parents are dentists. If we are to believe that the wizarding world doesn’t have professions for basic needs such as these, then what really is there for them to do? If you can wave a wand and cook an entire meal, what’s the point of chefs? If you can snap your fingers and apparate across the world, what’s the use of pilots or taxi drivers? The amount of sheltering that most of the wizards possess indicates that they are hardly ever exposed to the Muggle world. In that case, we can assume no wizard would take on a Muggle profession. With all ordinary jobs out of the picture and the scant array of choices in the wizarding world, I find it hard to believe that most grown wizards don’t simply travel and play around with spells constantly.
And with that, I bring you to my final frustration:
10. The absolute refusal to use anything Muggle-related.
Magic is wonderful and can accomplish a lot. But the level of dedication wizards give toward living like they’re still in Medieval Times is pretty confusing. For the love of everything magical, would it really kill them to use light bulbs? I understand the thrill of writing on parchment with quills, but at least get some adequate lighting. And come on, buy some cell phones. Why was Sirius risking blowing his cover so he could talk to Harry in a fire when he could've just texted him? A simple “did u put ur name in the goblet,” would've sufficed.
There a quite a few other things that are confusing when you sit down and really dissect the plot, but these are the ones I’ve personally pondered over the years. Thankfully, as fall approaches, so do the Harry Potter marathons. So, whether you’ve seen the series or not, snuggle up under some blankets, wrap your hands around a hot cup of chai, and see if you notice anything a little off, too.
