10 Signs You're an English Major | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

10 Signs You're an English Major

18
10 Signs You're an English Major
The Page Raid

English Majors are often the punchline to a lame joke, and while we may not be guaranteed a six-figure career, we can honestly say we followed our passions. Why else would we willingly choose to bury ourselves in student loans just to read and write about old dead guys? If you've ever had to explain your love of diagramming sentences, or convince a family member that there is validation in your plan of study, then hopefully you can relate to the following:

1. You dread every time someone asks your major because they will always assume you want to be a teacher.


2. You almost wish you did want to be an English teacher, so that you didn’t have to explain why you want to be a writer.

Or as they see it: a starving artist.


3. You’ve mastered this face whenever you hear jokes about working in a coffee shop or marrying rich.


4. You find ulterior meanings in almost everything.


5. Reading for fun is a thing of the past.

Sure, Beowulf and Heart of Darkness are great, but sometimes you miss mindless reading.


6. Which is why you treat your book collection like a work of art.

Even though you have shelves of books you haven't touched, you just can't seem to resist stopping in Barnes and Noble every once in a while.


7. When you do get a chance to read something other than homework, you find yourself diagramming sentences in your head.


8. You try and hide your excitement when a friend asks you to edit a paper.


9. You’ve presented a paper to your professor as if it was your newborn child.

Whether you spent the semester perfecting it, or managed to compile a questionable masterpiece overnight, it is sure to contain your blood, sweat, and tears.


10. You are terrified that after all the papers you’ve written, and all the knowledge you’ve acquired, you might actually become a barista.


Being an English Major can sometimes feel like you are slowly making your way to the edge of a plank. After all the reading, writing, and analyzing, you find yourself one step away from a vast, blank future. Most likely, you don't quite know what you want to do once the graduation cap comes off. And we may not be prepared to jump right into a definite career, but with our knowledge and skills, the possibilities are endless!

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Lifestyle

Moana's Top 10 Life Tips

"Moana" is filled with life lessons that involve far more than finding true love as many other Disney movies do.

36426
Animated image of a woman with long dark hair and tattoos
StableDiffusion

1. It's easy to be fooled by shiny things.

Digital image of shiny gemstones in cased in gold. shiny things StableDiffusion

Tamatoa created a liar filled with shiny things simply for the purpose of tricking fish to enter and become his food. He too experiences a lesson in how easy it is to be tricked by shiny things when Moana distracts him by covering herself in glowing algae so Maui can grab his hook.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

15 Rhyme Without Reason Greek Life Function Ideas

When you have no ideas for what to wear to this date function

318303
A dog and a frog
Healthy Pets

I am going to a rhyme without reason date function and I have looked at so many different rhyming words and I figured there need to be a new list of words. At these functions, there are usually at least two rockers and boxers and an umpteenth amount of dogs and frogs. I have come up with a list of creative and unique ideas for these functions.

If you like what you see, get a shopping cart going with these costumes.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

Yoga love

A long over due thank you note to my greatest passion.

30770
A person in a yoga pose surrounded by a supportive community of fellow yogis with a look of peace and gratitude on their face the image should convey the sense of strength mindfulness and appreciation that the writer feels towards yoga
StableDiffusion

Dearest Yoga,

You deserve a great thank you.

Keep Reading...Show less
Arts Entertainment

Epic Creation Myths: Norse Origins Unveiled

What happened in the beginning, and how the heavens were set in motion.

10879
The Norse Creation Myth

Now, I have the everlasting joy of explaining the Norse creation myth. To be honest, it can be a bit kooky, so talking about it is always fun. The entire cosmos is included in this creation myth, not just the earth but the sun and the moon as well. This will be a short retelling, a summary of the creation myth, somewhat like I did with Hermod's ride to Hel.

Keep Reading...Show less
Old school ghetto blaster sat on the floor
8tracks radio

We all scroll through the radio stations in the car every once in a while, whether its because we lost signal to our favorite one or we are just bored with the same ol' songs every day. You know when you're going through and you hear a song where you're just like "I forgot this existed!" and before you know it, you're singing every word? Yeah, me too. Like, 95% of the time. If you're like me and LOVE some good throwback music, here's a list of songs from every genre that have gotten lost in time, but never truly forgotten.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments