Samantha Bee is quite possibly my favorite person of all time.
The former Daily Show correspondent and now host of Full Frontal is a late-night comedy queen, feminist inspiration and all around boss babe rolled into one. Bee kills it every Wednesday night on TBS with her hilarious and cutting take on politics. Her intelligence, ability to point out hypocrisy and sharp tongue make her the perfect late-night host to deal with the world today. Since the show started in February 2016, Bee has tackled difficult issues, employed the most diverse staff in late night and advocated for every group of disenfranchised people. Here are 10 of the best Samantha Bee quotes that will inspire, enrage and call you to action:
1. "Men broke the country and now you need the ladies to come in and make it all better. No, it’s fine, honey, we’ll do it. You just go back to sleep. We were getting bored just holding down full-time jobs and raising our kids anyway."
2. Talking about police forces destroying untested rape kits: “You guys are taking the Marie Kondo method a little too far: ‘Does this rape kit spark joy? No? Into the trash, it goes. Thank you for your service.’ You wanna see a map of the states where police can legally incinerate your rape kit before the statute of limitations expires? You’re looking at it — it’s all of them!" Unthinkable, unacceptable and unfortunately true.
3.Discussing representatives blocking a proposal for the ability to use SNAP benefits for diapers: “Oh my God, conservatives, make up your minds about poor babies. We thought you wanted them to be born. Why else would you oppose free contraception, wage jihad against Planned Parenthood, fight the FDA on Plan B, and make abortion as unattainable for poor women as a ticket to Hamilton? Well, like it or not, there are a lot of poor babies, and it seems all you got for them is the same useless advice you’re giving their mothers: Keep your legs crossed.” Hypocrisy exhibit A
4. On Trump discussing a former Miss Universe's weight gain: “LOL, no, you had a stunningly beautiful Miss Universe winner, but you treated her like garbage. Now you have a real problem — not only with her but with any woman who has ever been called fat, which is all of us." Ugh.
5. On Harriet Tubman being put on the $20 bill: “Yes! Finally, a black woman making a white man move to the back. … When we make such a dramatic change to something we have to consider the fragile feelings of white men who tragically appear on only seven out of seven bills currently in production. … I hate to break it to you, Sparky — Jackson wasn’t involved in the founding of our country... He was not a founding father. He was a genocidal prick who forced the relocation of nonwhites and fomented populace rebellion — kind of like a Trump with better hair. ”
6. “After a generation spent successfully riling up the base with feverish anti-abortion rhetoric, it’s no surprise that the divisive issue has divided many from their own sanity. Since 1977, self-appointed soldiers of God have visited abortion providers with 185 incidents of arson, 42 bombings, 100 acid attacks, 26 attempted murders, and 11 actual murders. You know, pro-life stuff.” Hypocrisy exhibit B
7. “The Caucasian nation showed up in droves to vote for Trump, so I don’t want to hear a goddamn word about black voter turnout. How many times do we expect black people to build our country for us? White people, this is the worst thing we’ve ever — no I’m sorry, that’s a very high bar but holy shit! And don’t try to distance yourself from the bad apples and say, ‘It’s not my fault, I didn’t vote for him, #NotAllWhitePeople.’ Shush, shush, shush. If Muslims have to take responsibility for every member of their community, so do we.” White nationalism and supremacy are alive and well and that need to change that.
8. On Clinton and Trump discussing abortion in the third debate: “Two things: Hell. Yes. Men, if you don’t get why it’s important to have a woman as a major party nominee, check your social-media feed. Actually, log in as your wife. You’ll see that all women are sharing deeply personal stories of pregnancies that went wrong. They were buying "Nasty Woman" T-shirts and warming to a passionate unapologetic feminist we haven’t seen since the ’90s, one who stood in a shower of shit and managed to do what 16 party candidates and the entire Republican Establishment couldn’t — namely, beat this...Berlusconi knockoff like a little bitch. Her name is Hillary. Ms. Rodham, if you’re nasty" Yes, Hillary lost the election. Yes, Donald Trump is president. But Hillary's got him beat in about every other category (including 3 million popular votes).
9. On Roger Ailes' sexual harassment scandal: “His masterpiece — a right-wing nightmare factory powered by white resentment and relentless misinformation, churning out propaganda 24/7 and making family Thanksgivings unbearable for 20 years. Fox News is the only 24-hour news network to feature a strategically placed leg cam to showcase the most qualified body parts of its female contributors, plus a daily women’s show trading on the titillating tension between owning a harem and fear of emasculation. So yeah, turns out the guy who runs that network is kind of a creep. Who would’ve guessed?”
10. “America is still a great country and it is still worth fighting for. It has Shonda Rhimes shows and peanut butter and Beyoncé and Lin-Manuel Miranda rap-weeping at awards shows, and it has the beautiful U.S. constitution, which we should probably start teaching in schools. We still get to take pride in the peaceful transfer of power. And if Ms. Rodham’s not in the White House that’s okay — one of those girls is going to be. We still have millions of Nasty Women who aren’t going away, and as long as women over 25 are still allowed on television, I’ll be here, cheering them on.
Thanks for everything, Sam. Keep fighting. Keep inspiring. Keep speaking truth to power. Your fellow nasty women are right here with you.



























