1. "Oh, like, The Wire?"
Yeah! Didn't you know I was cast as the lead role? Just kidding, but if you're from Charm City you know there's more to us than just this (award-winning) show and its plot. Yet this is the usual response you get from people when you travel out of state.
2. We Have Crabs
Steamed crabs, crab cakes, crab dip, you name it. Miss me with that chain restaurant "crab shack" mess. If you're from Baltimore you know ALL the best local spots (Mr. Bill's Terrace Inn out in Essex is my personal favorite) and you wouldn't DARE eat an ounce of crab meat past state lines, and it's got to be listed at MKT Price. #CrabSnob
3. You Are Sick of Your State Flag
Ha! Good joke. Never. Call us Frank's Red Hot, we put that sh*t on everything. You can't go five minutes without seeing that beautiful red, white, yellow and black. Sorry, we're not sorry.
4. Preakness
Live music, horses (supposedly), sunburns and beers. Catch your local ladies at InField Fest in their colorful dresses and your pretty Maryland boys in, well, most likely whatever they managed to throw on that morning. Probably some Hawaiian print button-down, unbuttoned. Swoon?
5. Snowballs
No, it's not a snow cone. Nope, not a water ice (whatever that is), and definitely not a slushie. If you're from around these parts you already know to get the marshmallow fluff on top, otherwise it's just not messy enough, and where's the fun in that!?
6. I Got Old Bay In My Bag
Thanks, Bey, but you can keep your hot sauce. I got my 24 oz. can ready to go right next to my car keys. Swag.
7. Natty Boh Beer
We don't drink it because it's good, we drink it because it's Bawlmer nostalgia, Hon! (And cheap.)
8. Bawlmerese
If you're from Baltimore and don't have our lovely accent, you can definitely still understand one. Can anyone out of state please translate, "Ah gawt to g'owe, ah left ma arn owin. Ah dohn't wunt to stahrt a far." - I'll wait.
9. Royal Farms
Our beloved RoFo chicken always makes an appearance at family gatherings. Family reunions, baby showers, funerals; it's never too casual. And we proudly stand by the fact that it's better than WaWa. Period.
10. Smalltimore
Like it or not, you will never go anywhere in town without seeing someone you know. In fact, you'd probably find a Baltimore connection halfway across the country. We live in a big city with a small-town feel. Trust me, if not today, one day you'll appreciate it.
