You might be wondering what I mean by not letting your "ex back in." I say "ex" because I don't feel like I can put a gender on it. Both females and males can be the bad guy in this story.

So, imagine this if you can. You have been going out with the same person for, let's say, two years. You are in love and so comfortable with them that you never thought that something bad could ever happen. But then it hits and everything comes crashing down. You find out that they cheated on you, or maybe they dumped you for another person. They did something so bad that you guys ended up breaking things off.

Now, two years is a long time. You start seeing them take pictures with other people of the opposite sex, they aren't talking to you anymore, they may even be saying things about you that are not true. You see them out in public with other people and you feel a sort of nostalgia for all the times that you guys had together. You end up feeling like you lost a big part of your life, and it is hard.

But, like any other break up, you slowly pick up the pieces and you glue yourself back together. It isn't easy, but you manage somehow. You start getting all dolled up just because you want to and you want to feel confident again. You go somewhere to hang out with your buds and decide that you are going to have a night where you just have fun. You feel free again. Even though there is a little part of you that still lingers in the past, threatening to pull you back to the emptiness you felt. But that part of you is shrinking more and more as time goes by.

Then it hits again.

They text you "I miss you," or they bump into you when you're walking to your car after class. They start talking to you again and become sweet and apologetic saying, "I didn't know what I had until I lost you" or something similar to that. You feel that familiar pull of attraction as they bring up the good times that you had together. Or maybe they don't even do that. Maybe they are just being nice again and acting like they did when you were just friends. And now, you're realizing how much you missed it.

And again, it hits you.

You start getting thoughts of getting back together. Maybe they proposed it, or you are just thinking about pursuing it. Either way, the outcome is the same. You just want him back.

Don't. Do. It.

You guys broke up for a reason. If you let them back in now, you will be throwing away all that progress you gained through getting over them. But now you are thinking "to hell with it!" and you want to throw everything back into giving it another try. No matter what your friends are telling you, you are at an impasse. Stuck between wanting what you once had together and knowing how much it hurt when it ended.

If you find yourself in this predicament, let these ten things help you push on.

One, if they can do it once, they can do it again. Two, how much trust do you really have in them now? Three, what are you saying is okay to do by getting back together with them after that? Four, remember how they acted when you guys broke up. Five, remember the way you felt when they screwed you over. Six, what did they do right after you ended things? Seven, remember all the progress you have made since that horrible break up. Eight, maybe you guys have broken up more than once already. When will you say enough is enough? Nine, if you couldn't make it work the first time, what changed that will make this time any different? Remember that you broke up for a reason.

And then there is ten. You. Deserve. Better.

If none of those help you to see the light at the end of the tunnel, I don't know what will. You are strong. You are desirable. You could have so much better. Why do you think they came back after all this time? Because they know that they had something good and they don't want any other person, that will treat you right, get their hands on you. They know that, if that were to happen, they would lose you for good. Odds are, they are just keeping you in their back pocket so they can pull you out whenever they want. And by getting back together with them, you are allowing it to go on.

So do yourself a favor; don't let them back in. Keep pushing forward and focusing on you. Find what you want in this life. Enjoy being single in your own right. It is not a bad thing. Try new things. Meet new people. I promise you, your person will come into your life when you're least expecting it. At least this way you will be ready to fall for the right one, instead of going back to the wrong one.

Don't let your ex back in.