The thrill and excitement of going on vacation is great and all, but the time spent getting there is never the most pleasant. If you’re flying during the holiday season, I feel for you. As you cringe through this list, just remember–it’s (almost) always worth it.
1. Cost and fees
Oh, the ticket is how much? Pardon me as I sacrifice a week’s pay to sit in a metal tube for approximately 1.5 hours. Instead of emailing me about upgrading to first class, I’d really appreciate the option of downgrading and riding with the luggage. I’d save money that way, right?
2. Going through security
You know that you don’t have anything illegal in your carry-on, but you’re nervous anyway. What if they don’t approve of the bottle of mouthwash that claims to be TSA approved? It feels like you have all the time in the world while you’re waiting to step into the metal box of body examinations, but once you walk through it, it feels like literally everyone in line is waiting on you to gather your belongings and put your belt back on. C’mon slowpoke.
3. Bland, over-priced food
You’d never pay $5.50 for a plain bagel with cream cheese elsewhere, but when you’re in line with a bunch of hangry other individuals, you blindly swipe your card, hopeful that you can look forward to that creamy and delicious bagel. Unfortunately, the satisfaction is far less than anticipated. At least you have a $5 bottle of SmartWater to wash it down.
4. Having to check your carry-on
It’s always the moment of truth when you’re pushing and shoving your carry-on into the overhead compartment. You try and manipulate it as much as possible, sacrificing whatever you have crammed in there in order to avoid checking the bag as luggage. Oh, you have no doubts you’re being judged by the other passengers, watching your sad struggle. You know it’s all over when the attendant gives you the look.
5. Sharing an arm rest
Two people. Three arm rests. Four arms. This is a predicament for anyone who dislikes social interaction. The safe bet is to just avoid the middle arm rest entirely – but when you instinctively rest your arm there and make physical contact, things get slightly uncomfortable.
6. Being stuck in the middle seat
When you actually have the option of choosing your seat, you naturally look for the option with the least amount of social contact. The dream? A single window seat. The nightmare? The middle of three seats. Who knows who will end up next to you. May the odds be ever in your favor.
7. Having a small child behind you
Surprise, your seat is actually a dysfunctional massage chair. Just kidding, there’s a four year old behind you who wanted pretzels when his mom got him peanuts. Children have far too much energy to be contained in an airplane, let alone restrained by seatbelt in a chair for more than ten minutes. Is this flight over yet?
8. Actually having to use the bathroom
You try your best to avoid using the tiny excuse of a bathroom. You start scoping out the competition, seeing who’s in line. Do you stand up and wait, or sit there and hope you’ll catch the moment where no one’s waiting by the door? The second you walk in, you immediately regret your decisions. You certainly should have waited for a sanitary bathroom.
9. Having to make small talk
If you’re the first one to your seat, you don’t really know what to expect of your neighbors-in-flight. You can set the stage by reading a book or performing other antisocial activities. But when you’re the last one in your row to take your seat, you’re definitely judging the people you’re about to sit next to. If they’re chatting it up, brace yourself for a very talkative flight. If they’re sitting there, avoiding all eye contact whatsoever, you’ve scored yourself a flight of neighborly solitude.
10. Losing your luggage
The absolute worst moment of traveling by plane? Standing at baggage claim as the very last suitcase continues to whirl around the belt, knowing that it is not yours. What, you may ask, could have happened to your luggage? Layovers are the bane of airline existence. There are barcodes for scanning and locations clearly listed on your flight tags. Do they serve no purpose? Does my clothing belong in this exotic city you speak of? Enjoy your wait at customer service, friends. But wait, before you go, don’t forget to fill out a survey to provide feedback on your experience!
