1.) What kind of language do they use?

I'm not specifically talking about cuss words, I'm talking about what words do they use to convey what they're thinking? Do they use gentle words that help diffuse a difficult situation, or do they use words that add fuel to the fire? What words do they use when talking about women or men? What words would they use to describe someone they don't like? Do they encourage or tear people down?

It's important to find someone with integrity, who uses respectful words to describe people and situations.

2.) Do they go out of their way for others, not just you?

Most of the time, a significant other will go our of their way for you. Sometimes, we're so blinded by the fact that they help us all the time, but we never see that they never take time out of their day to help other people. This proves that they aren't as selfless as we think.

3.) What kind of jokes do they laugh at?

Do they laugh at innocent, genuinely funny jokes? Or, do they laugh at jokes that hurt people? A few examples are: rape jokes, racist jokes, sexist jokes, etc. As Christians, we shouldn't do these things because it turns people off of the Gospel. Why would a Christian laugh at something that hurts other people? Unfortunately, most of us fall prey to this, but be watchful of the people who are proud of these jokes.

4.) How prideful are they?

Pride is a bear trap that is extremely difficult to pry yourself from. We are all prideful in some way or another, but it is important to keep an eye out for these very poisonous types of pride: stubbornness, ignorance, unable to listen, unable to obey, unable to respect people with different opinions, unable to respect unjust authority, arrogance, etc. Any type of pride can add a stumbling block to your relationship. It is a daily choice to say "I'm going to choose not to be prideful in this situation".

5.) What do their social media accounts consist of?

I am all for loving yourself and posting a selfie when you know you look cute and want to share it with the world, but if they are showing too much, posting too much, then they may have an addiction to social media. I know from experience, that social media can be addicting, but it can also change your perception of the world and give you false expectations for people and situations around you. Do they use social media in moderation, or is it a 24/7 activity for them?

Also, take a look at their Instagram pictures or how they talk to other men and women. Are they super flirtatious with multiple people? Are their pictures more like-baiting rather than a regular post? Sometimes, when people feel empty in an area of their life, they fill it with social media (I've definitely done the same). It's important to find someone who is willing to free themselves of that addiction and let God replace that void.

6.) How consistent are they with church attendance and overall presence?

I completely understand that some people just don't go to a regular Sunday morning church and that the Sabbath is a personal thing decided by God when to partake in. But, if your S.O. is not present at all and doesn't even try to make his/her ministry a priority, then there is definitely something dead inside of them. Remember, the bible teaches us that faith without works is dead. And, if you are looking for someone mature in their faith, then they should already have been growing through work.

7.) Is it more Romeo and Juliet or Boaz and Ruth?

Romeo and Juliet is a tale about two extremely young, self-destructive lovers who are very selfish and only live for the sake of their love. If your parents are strict, as a Christian, it is hard to try and look for a significant other, but do not stray to your own methods of doing things. Not with this situation, anyways. It can lead to disobedience, lies, and all around discourse between you and your family. If this is already happening to you, it may be a sign that you should wait to date. Do not be like Romeo and Juliet.

Boaz protected Ruth, provided for Ruth, and honored her. The timing was right for them, so wait and ask God if the time is right for you to be "window shopping".

8.) Are you experiencing "Youth Camp Infatuation"?

Almost every Christian experiences this. There's always the one person at camp that you could see yourself marrying and having 10 kids with some day. Then you hear stories about people meeting at youth camp when they're brace-faced 13 year olds and they end up marrying each other six years later.

I'm not going to be a cynic towards people who experience this, because I did too. And, well, I've been dating my camp crush from three years ago for a year now. So, I won't completely turn you away from that special someone, but understand that being out of town, under the stars, singing worship songs that set a intimate atmosphere can make you feel things about someone who turns out to be not-so-great. At the time, my boyfriend really was not-so-great, but as we grew older and more mature, and I broke free of my infatuation, that's when God brought us together.

9.) What does God think?

If you haven't really sat down and talked to God about him, like really talked, then maybe it's time to do that. Also, keep your prayers directed towards submitting to God. And by that, I mean, keep the ball in His court. I remember praying "God, please let it be them, I'll do anything!" and seeing negative results. But, when I started praying, "God, whatever your plan is, I ask for your strength to accept it and move on, because I know you have something good waiting for me", that's when my life began to change.

10.) Are you settling?

Sometimes, we meet someone and think "Oh, they're great. I'm not too attracted to them, but I'll give it a try." And that's not a bad thing! Sometimes you need to spend time with someone before you can understand them and become attracted to them. But, sometimes, even when you know you aren't right for each other, and you know God thinks the same thing, you still continue to pursue them halfheartedly.

This happened to me, and it did a lot of damage. This guy was super handsome, super funny, and honestly, I really was attracted to him. But, there was something missing. I wasn't attracted to him on a Godly level, I was attracted to him on a level that satisfied me and only me. But, I continued to pursue him and believed we loved each other. Unfortunately, it easily fell apart with one text message and we both mutually agreed that we weren't working out. I was prepared to settle. But, with God's intervention, He protected me from making a bad decision and then soon led me to the man I love now.

If you're looking for a significant other, my suggestion is to review these questions, determine whether or not you're settling, and make the decision. This is sort of a wake up call for those who need it. Trust me, it will save you a lot of heartache.