Congratulations! You've survived the summer before The Rest of Your Life! You've been dreaming about this moment for months, years even, and now you're busy packing up and triple checking your packing lists. Now you're broke but you're ready. However, there's one thing they may not have told you on any of your ten visits. You see, there's a very specific way we do things around here. It's the kind of thing we don't really talk about, an evangelical fight club situation, but there is an understood code of ethics we here at Gordon College follow. It is in your best interest to adhere strictly to these, the 10 Gordon Commandments.
1. Thou Shalt Walk With Caution
The middle of the sidewalk belongs to the long boarders. Just deal with it. Every other inch of campus, however, belongs to the geese. They are filled with the fire of ten thousand suns and are void of even a trace of mercy. Practice your skills in peacekeeping and always, always look down first. The one and quite possibly only highlight of the winter months is that the land mines they cover the quad in will be either frozen or buried under layers of winter. Don't get too comfortable with their temporary absence, however: these geese don't migrate.
2. Thou Shalt Honor the Experience Day
There's the packed parking lot, the hordes of gawking strangers, the same speech you heard in chapel last month, the smiles you may or may not believe, and a general sense of chaos. But trust me when I say it's worth it. The second you walk into that food court, you will suddenly forget what the word 'admissions' even means. Complaining gets significantly harder when you are enjoying a puffed pastry shaped like a swan.
3. Thou Shalt Take A Side
Voting third party is not an option in this ancient debate: Tevas or Chacos? Compare tan lines, fabric, color options, pricing, and sentimental value, whatever you have to do to establish your sandals as the alpha. They're not just shoes; they are an extension of yourself and the wedge between many a good friend, so think wisely before pledging your allegiance.
4. Thou Shalt Be Aware of Your Surroundings
One of Gordon's charms is its small, tight-knit community, but there will certainly be moments you wished it was more of a loose crochet kind of deal. Don't let the teeny tiny undergrad population catch you off guard. Your Carpe Diem clock is ticking because before you know it, you will recognize almost everyone you pass on the sidewalk and this will greatly affect most of your future decisions.
5. Thou Shalt Embrace the Crunchy Life
When I say you cannot walk three steps on this campus without encountering at least ten, sticker covered Nalgenes carried by a bunned and/or bearded, Himalayan-sweater-wearing long boarder who just finished a kale salad, I'm not exaggerating. Unless you enjoy hiking in the dark and eating organic chickpea cookies, you're not going to have a whole lot in common with them. But you have to admit, they're kind of the coolest in the way only a true minimalist can be. You will learn to love this way of life that has so widely swept this campus. In fact, you might find yourself at least considering the purchase of an ENO by the time September rolls around.
6. Thou Shalt Adopt A Severe Tea Addiction
If you were a die-hard coffee addict before coming to Gordon, you'll have a pretty good chance of maintaining your caffeine dependence this way as there are many French Press Snobs around and about. However, there is an even more overwhelming presence on campus in the hot drink department: beware the loose leaf tea drinkers. They'll laugh in your face if you say "Oh yes, I too love a good cup of tea" and whip out a bag of Lipton while they complete the final step of sun brewing a pot of white peach. Tea dates are considered their very own love language and are the means by which many friendships find their roots. Give it a try.
7. Thou Shalt Understand the Ratio
One of the first things you will notice the moment you step onto campus is the undeniable lack of balance between the representation of the sexes. There are between two and three times as many women on this campus as there are men. Be aware of this for it means a few things for you right off the bat:
1. If you are seen with a member of the opposite sex in any setting, expect questions pertaining to the wedding date, because of course, you've already got at least that part ironed out.
2. No one believes you if you take a walk in the woods with your "friend". Literally, no one. Not even Tom, so don't bother explaining yourself.
3. Ring by spring is practically theology around here, so good luck with casual dating.
4. Sometimes, when the school rents a bus to shuttle students to Conwell for Winter Ball, the driver will say, "This is a co-ed school, right?" and you'll have to laugh instead of cry because it is just too real.
8. Thou Shalt Learn the Lingo
You saw a cute girl in your Spanish class, but you can't remember her name. You know a few basic things, her year and dorm, so you take it to the Go site. Within minutes, you know enough to secure at least a casual walk in the woods. Congratulations! You just discovered the wonders of GoStalk, the affectionate nickname of Gordon's "People search" function. If you ask to meet in Easton Dining Hall, no one will have a clue where to find you; dark side or sunny side, the choice is yours. Bonus tips: no one calls them Gordon Police, it's GoPo and most of us don't even remember what the letters in the acronym KOSC stand for.
9. Thou Shalt Take It All In
No matter how strong you think you are, it will be almost impossible to resist snapping a photo of the chapel at sunset, and we don’t blame you: Gordon is situated in one of the most beautiful, picture-perfect locations on the coast, especially during the fall months. Do not take advantage of this gem; get out and explore the woods, jump in the pond, and soak up as many New England sunsets as you can handle.
10. Thou Shalt Have A Voice
Like any college, there are seasons of unrest and turmoil on campus when big issues come to the surface and everyone is scrambling for a place in the conversation. These next few years are some of the most pivotal when it comes to understanding what kind of role you are to play in the grand scheme of life and it's filled with trial, error, and a whole lot of self-discovery. No matter which side of the coin your personal convictions place you, find your side, always staying authentic and true. This campus needs your presence, your voice, and your heart.
