Is it okay to do things by myself?

A couple of weeks ago, I got a text from my boyfriend showing a screenshot of a text post. It said:

Go to that concert by yourself. Go eat at that restaurant you keep saying you want to go to. Do what you want. Don't wait on people. And if your friends don't want to do it... do it anyways.

It was a nice reminder that it's okay to do things alone sometimes. It still seems somewhat socially unacceptable to do things by yourself. And I understand where these ideas come from. Humans are naturally social, and being around others can nurture our soul and help us grow. We enjoy sharing experiences with others. By societal norms, activities such as eating out or seeing a movie are viewed as social activities to be enjoyed with others. But seeing someone on their own does not always equate to him or her being lonely or having no friends.

I actually enjoy doing some things by myself (though yes, in some situations I do feel lonely or wish someone was with me). Shopping with friends can be fun, but sometimes it's just better alone. I can spend a full hour trying on clothes without the pressure of my roommate or boyfriend waiting for me. Or I go to the lake and walk around the loop as many times as I want and take pictures without dragging someone else along.

We live in a world of constant stimulation and contact. If you're not talking with a friend, you're able to go online and view a YouTube video or scroll through Instagram and Snapchat and see what everyone else is doing. And all of that stimulation can be exhausting. It's nice to have a little time for yourself. But who says that "me time" always has to be spent at home?

I love being out in nature and have taken solo day trips to the beach just to sit out with a book and listen to the waves. I drove two and a half hours to go to a concert by myself on a Tuesday because I didn't really know anyone else who wanted to go. And you know what? I had a great time. Yes, in life, it's nice to have someone there with you sharing moments that cannot be recreated. But if you truly want to do something, why should the fear of the prospect of doing it alone be an obstacle?

I've been wanting to see Bad Bunny in concert since 2017. But every year, there's been some reason I couldn't go. In 2017, it was because I didn't have enough money to buy tickets. In 2018, it was because I waited too long trying to find people to go with and didn't have the money for it. So when I saw he was coming back to my area in 2019, I knew I was going to go. But my boyfriend wasn't interested and it'd be really hard for him to get a Saturday night off work. Two girls that I know that are into his music bought front row tickets that I simply can't afford.

So after spending the past few months trying to think of people to ask along, I finally bought myself a ticket and resolved that I will go by myself. And that's okay! I was so excited after getting my ticket that I wanted to do a victory lap around my work building. Sure, it would definitely be fun to have someone to go with. I went to a concert with my boyfriend last week and we had an amazing time together. But I'm kind of looking forward to having an evening to myself dancing my ass off with thousands of other people in an arena. That's the kind of stuff that I live for.

It takes a degree of confidence and initiative to do things solo, of which you should be proud. And if I'm going to be frowned upon because I'm hanging out at the Bad Bunny concert by myself, then, well. So be it. I'm going to do it anyways.

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