For Those Who Struggling To Leave That Toxic Person

You Don't Actually Miss Them You're Just Feeling Nostalgic

Nostalgia is pretty normal, but don't let it excuse the trouble they caused you.

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Recently, I have been missing a certain person who was only in my life for a short time.

Even though I had made so many good memories with this person in such a short time, I had to cut them off entirely for numerous reasons.

I just couldn't handle the way they started treating me. It was as if one day I was their favorite person, and by the next day, I didn't even exist.

I used to blame myself for it and try to be different, but I noticed a pattern repeating itself from some of my old friendships/relationships.

This person was a covert narcissist. They did everything in their power to rip me to shreds, and then they played victim by making it seem like I was the problem.

I cut them off with no warning or explanation about three months ago. I thought things would start to get better immediately after.

I was wrong.

Even though I was at peace knowing they couldn't contact me anymore, something was missing.

I was missing...them.

I didn't understand. If they treated me so horribly by abusing me mentally and even physically, why do I long for them? Shouldn't I hate them?

However, recently I came across a Facebook post that made my entire experience make sense.

When you find yourself "missing" a toxic person, you don't actually miss them. You're experiencing nostalgia.

The reason I longed to have this person back knowing how horrible they were to me was that we had so many good memories together. I was ready to let go of the person, but not the memories.

I was going through a lot of stress when I met them, and they were always down to hang out. We would spend hours upon hours together, and it felt like two seconds. Sometimes we would even spend the entire day together and make plans to get together the next day!

They gave me a glimpse of happiness amidst all of the stressors in my life.

I got to experience new things, go to new places, try new foods and get to know someone who I seemed to have a strong connection with.

Yes, they were horrible, but not all the time. I missed all the good times we had together, but I have to remind myself that the bad outweighed the good.

It's normal to feel nostalgic when reflecting on old relationships, even if they were harmful. It's okay to "miss" them, but no matter what, do not bring them back into your life.

You deserve so much better.

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45 Throwback Songs You Probably Forgot Existed

But you know you still know every word.
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We all scroll through the radio stations in the car every once in a while, whether its because we lost signal to our favorite one or we are just bored with the same ol' songs every day. You know when you're going through and you hear a song where you're just like "I forgot this existed!" and before you know it, you're singing every word? Yeah, me too. Like, 95% of the time. If you're like me and LOVE some good throwback music, here's a list of songs from every genre that have gotten lost in time, but never truly forgotten (all gifs from Giphy).

1. "Big Pimpin'" - Jay-Z ft. UGK

Jay-Z gives us a ballad about, you guessed it, pimpin' big in NYC. Jay-Z's rhymes paired with that catchy beat is just bound to get stuck in your head for the rest of the night.

2. "Mr. Brightside" - The Killers


If you say that you don't know any of the words to this song, you're the worst kind of person... a liar. This classic has left stamps of its lyrics on 99% of the population, and has a forever spot in my soul.

3. "Lose Yourself" - Eminem


This song always leaves me feeling like I could sign a record deal and launch my career as a rap/hip-hop legend... and craving spaghetti.

4. "Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American) - Toby Keith


A ballad for the ages that brings the overly patriotic American badass out of all of us.

5. "Drop It Like It's Hot" - Snoop Dogg ft. Pharrell Williams

SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!

6. "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" - Green Day

This song makes me want to walk down a lonely road, preferably a dark one, and reflect on all of my life choices. Nevertheless, it's still a fantastic song.

7. "My Boo" - Ghost Town DJs

The "running man" has brought this one back, and I couldn't be happier.

8. "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" - Panic! At The Disco

If your friends don't "chime in" by screaming the chorus at the top of their lungs in the car with you, it's time to leave them there and find new friends. Also, did anyone ever tell the groom what his bride has been up to?

9. "Semi-Charmed Life" - Third Eye Blind


A life anthem for all of us. Third Eye Blind has recently released another album. My inner child is tingling.

10. "Baby Got Back" - Sir Mix A Lot



Nicki Minaj sampled this in her song "Anaconda" in 2014. Take a minute to realize that some people have heard that, but not the REAL jam that the sample came from. Now, cry.

11. "Sk8er Boi" - Avril Lavigne


Sk8er boi, you would be good enough for me. It's what's on the inside that counts.

12. "Milkshake" - Kelis

It's day 4. The milkshake is curdled in the yard. There are still no boys to be found.

13. "Get Low" - Lil Jon ft. Ying Yang Twinz


The real question is which version is better: Lil Jon's or Sandra Bullock's?

14. "Hey Ya!" - Outkast


You've heard the song, but have you ever really listened to or analyzed the lyrics that you knew by heart by the age of 10? Do it.

15. "Check Yes Or No" - George Strait


You don't have to be a country lover to know this song. My hardcore rocker/screamo friend even knows the chorus. Don't try and tell me you don't. I don't like liars.

16. "Ride Wit Me" - Nelly


"Ayyyyye, must be the monaaayyy!" - frequently screamed lyric

17. "Hollaback Girl" - Gwen Stefani


This song made all of the shit B-A-N-A-N-A-S when it came on. Still does.

18. "I'm Like A Bird" - Nelly Furtado


If "Whoa, Nelly!" wasn't the album of your childhood, you may want to have a conversation with your parents. Another great product from this album was "Turn Off The Light", both of which were top 10 hits.

19. "Pony" - Ginuwine


Even though I can't hear this song without seeing Channing Tatum's half naked body in my mind, it's still one of my favorite songs to hear. Instant day brightener when I hear that funky beat at the beginning.

20. "U Got It Bad" - Usher


Usher made me fall in love with a person I met at the grocery store with this one. Beautiful lyrics, beautifully sung.

21. "Cleanin' Out My Closet" - Eminem


As sad as these lyrics are, Eminem really hit this one out of the park.

22. "Poison" - Bel Biv Devoe


Why would you kiss her if she is poison? That just doesn't sound very smart,

23. "Gangstas Paradise" - Coolio


10/10 would recommend listening to Weird Al's parody of this song.

24. "No Diggity" - Blackstreet ft. Dr. Dre and Queen Pen


As great as Anna Kendrick is at rapping this song, nothing tops the original.

25. "No Scrubs" - TLC


This song has had some girls accepting nothing less than the best since its release in 1999.

26. "Gin & Juice" - Snoop Dogg


Snoop D-O-double G cranked this bad boy out in 1993, before I was born. Regardless, I still know every word.

27. "It Was A Good Day" - Ice Cube


The first time I heard this may have been on Grand Theft Auto, but that doesn't mean that it isn't a great song.

28. "What's Your Fantasy" - Ludacris


Another song that I knew most of the lyrics to that I probably shouldn't have at a young age.

29. "Thriller" - Michael Jackson


Dubbed as the "King of Pop," MJ was a hero to many. Despite some allegations made against him, his records continue to sell and be listened to across the world.

30. "Wannabe" - Spice Girls


The Spice Girls gave their men some basic guidelines in this staple song from the 90's. If you know the story from A-Z, you are probably a lyrical genius.

31. "It Wasn't Me" - Shaggy


Bro, she caught you in the action. It was probably most definitely you.

32. "Everybody (Backstreets Back)" - Backstreet Boys


They really were back, and we all wish they had stayed.

33. "I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing" - Aerosmith


If anyone every legitimately sings this to me, I WILL cry.

34. "Welcome to the Black Parade" - My Chemical Romance


Nostalgia. Nostalgia everywhere.

35. "Misery Business" - Paramore


I can't tell if I want to be Hayley Williams or be ON Hayley Williams. I'd be okay with either. #girlcrush

36. "Steal My Sunshine" - Len


This feel good song makes me want to rip open a popsicle and ride my bicycle around town.

37. "Fly" - Sugar Ray


As repetitive as this is, this song will never get old.

38. "Waiting on the World to Change" - John Mayer


Yes John, we're still waiting too.

39. "Song 2" - Blur

WOO-HOO!

40. "Buddy Holly" - Weezer


Weezer may have hated this song, but we are glad they recorded it.

41. "Wonderwall" - Oasis


I think millennials were born knowing the lyrics to this song.

42. "Sweet Caroline" - Neil Diamond


BA BA BAAAAAAA!

43. "No Rain" - Blind Melon


Maybe it's just me who is obsessed with this song, but if you haven't heard it, I highly recommend.

44. "Champagne Supernova" -Oasis


Another song that I truly believe that millennials were born knowing the lyrics to. Coincidence that they are both by Oasis?

45. "99 Problems" - Jay-Z


I have 99 problems, and this playlist solves all of them.

Cover Image Credit: 8tracks radio

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My 2000s Era Childhood Is Back And Better Than Ever

Here's how I feel about how things from my childhood are becoming relevant again.

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From live-action adaptations of popular video game characters to former Disney Channel stars making comebacks, I feel like I'm in elementary school again. While it's nice to see the Jonas Brothers making music together again, it's made me think about a few things. The first being why is there a seemingly sudden influx of adaptions and comebacks of things that were relevant in the past decade? Also, when and what are we going to readapt and make relevant again from 2019 in 2029? Finally, what really is nostalgia and how is our generation's sense of nostalgia unique to others? Here's what I have to say.

I've only been alive for 19 and a half years, and nostalgia has only recently become a new feeling for me. I'm aware that every generation experiences nostalgia and wanting the "good old days back", but when is it supposed to hit? No one ever told me. When you think about it, aren't we a little bit too young to be feeling nostalgic? We're only a few years removed from being considered children, but we haven't truly lived life yet. I only say this because whenever I heard the words "nostalgia" or "the good old days" it was usually coming from an older adult or a senior citizen. I never anticipated using those words truthfully until I was around that age too.

What I think brought out my feelings of nostalgia was when I realized that I was fast approaching the age that most of my favorite childhood TV and movie characters were and that most of them were now well into their twenties and thirties. Personally, I think I took what happened in my favorite shows and movies a little too seriously and translated a lot of what I learned in them to my own personal life, so once I reached the point when I turned 18, around the same age Disney Channel and Nick aged their main characters to in the final seasons, I felt a bit lost. I didn't really know what to expect from life because I hadn't seen what life was supposed to be like as a young adult because I didn't watch anything as a kid where the main plot was centered around a college student. It was kind of my own version of being thrust into the real world with little relevant knowledge.

With the comebacks and adaptations, it's kind of leaving off where my childhood TV shows and movies initially left off however many years ago. Even though I'm not taking it quite as seriously as I did when I was a kid, I do find it nice. I don't have to keep referring to "the good old days" when a lot of what was relevant in my childhood is all of a sudden still relevant. So this time around, I'm definitely going to appreciate things from my childhood while they're still relevant.

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