I never really had healthy coping mechanisms, especially not when it came to stress. Whenever I felt overwhelmed with work or school or just anything major that was going on with my life, I allowed myself a few minutes to panic and get all the negative emotions out before jumping straight back into my work. No weak bitch moments allowed.
Usually, this worked out fine for me until I went to college. Somehow the stress was more tangible and much more real, and it ended up manifesting itself in physical ways. I slouched a lot more recently, my already poor posture worsening. I ground my teeth so often I worried I was wearing them down into little nubs of bone. My shoulders were always tense and I always had a crick in my neck.
Basically, I was a geriatric in a 19-year-old girl's body.
Nothing worked for me. Cardio was torture and while I loved weight-lifting, it seemed to only add to my ever-present soreness. I looked into CBD oil and other such medications which could maybe soothe the constant aches I felt throughout the day. Finally, at the suggestion of my roommate, I took a yoga class at my usual gym.
My love for yoga wasn't immediate.
The first inversion my instructor taught us terrified me and left me petrified, but as I kept going to classes I felt myself become more and more comfortable with my body. Eventually, I found my own instructors online through videos on YouTube and I learned which poses felt best for me.
Most importantly, I finally learned how to relax. I learned to stop planning for the future and leave some time for the present moment, saving at least 10 minutes a day to myself and bringing awareness to how I was feeling physically and emotionally. I learned to practice self-care in a way that opened the gates to me being more conscious about my needs and stressors.
I learned to listen to my body and give it the attention and love it was craving.
I'm still learning how to practice self-care every day, but yoga opened the gates for a brighter, happier version of myself (with no cricks in her neck).
