Was it ever your dream to work at one of the greatest stores in the world, the very store where you buy your underwear and all your other cute little PINK jackets and sweatpants? Well, dear readers, read on to see why working at this store is not everything it seems to be.
1. The panty bars.
If I ever tell you that I get war flashbacks from the panty bars, please believe every single word of that statement. Folding panties was one of the three major components (along with bra fittings and pushing Angel Card signups) of being a sales associate at Victoria's Secret. You think "Oh, that can't be that bad?" Wait till the $7/28 Panty Party commences.
2. The underwear has been in some places.
I'm telling you this from my experience handling the panties: they will go right on the dirty floor while we fold and organize them by ROYGBIV. Sometimes they go under our armpits while we organize them. People can (and will) try them on in the fitting rooms without using a hygienic liner* because they are generally terrible people.
*PLEASE wash your undies after you buy them and before you put them on.*
3. Pray you never have to work in PINK.
Remember when I said the panty bars were a disaster zone? PINK's very own panty bar experiences Category 5 destruction every. Single. Day. It takes a village to get the entire room back in order every night.
4. Potential thieves will resort to dumb ways to remove sensors.
Some people think they're slick and will use rubber bands or other random tools to remove the sensors from merchandise. Seriously, people, save yourself the embarrassment, save yourself the work, and just buy the friggin' panties.
5. Male customers are the most fun to work with.
While the women will already have it figured out, nearly all the male patrons are clueless. They'll usually be shopping for their girlfriends, wives, etc., and have no idea what is going on, so they're always seeking a female perspective.
6. The Angel Cards.
We had to ask customers if they wanted to buy an Angel Card not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES. Being that I have anxiety, I hated asking them again after they said no once.
7. BRA. FITTINGS.
Victoria's Secret is the leading seller and manufacturer of bras in the world. When you work here, there is an emphasis placed on getting customers to the Fitting Room after measuring their bra size to fill out their Fit Cards. But the problem is, most employees are not great at accurately measuring sizes. After I measured someone, I always told them to go to the Fitting Room specialist to check for accuracy. Sometimes I'd be right on the money, but other times I'd be off by a band or two. I'm just saying, it doesn't hurt to double-check in the Fitting Room, guys.
8. No, dudes, you can't go into the Fitting Room with your girlfriend.
Do I even need to explain why?
9. The hours are long. Very long.
You'll have call-in shifts nearly every day and forget about leaving on the dot. If your assigned area is not reset to 100% by the time you're scheduled to leave, plan on staying for at least another hour. Let's just say when you get to leave, the roosters will probably be crowing.
10. Clothing was sometimes strewn about the store.
People will pick up clothing items like PINK sweatpants and carelessly throw it in another section of the store thinking we employees wouldn't notice. This is irritating and very lazy. And I WILL give you the death stare when you're not looking.
11. The Fitting Room.
Working the Fitting Room is the most important role anyone can have. Checking the patrons' bras to see if they fit properly, opening rooms, taking care of go-backs...it's an integral part of Vicky's Secret and if you're ever put in charge of it...good luck!
12. The Semi-Annual Sale.
That is all.
*They have liners in the Fitting Rooms. Don't be nasty.
