If you have experienced it, then you know the feeling. You were told over and over that the first love is the hardest goodbye. “It will only get easier,” says your mom, friends and everyone who cares about you, as you feel the first pit in your stomach after your first true break-up. Whether it was middle school, high school or college, you seem to have found yourself curled up in a ball acting as young as you were when boys still had cooties. There is no denying that those days eating tubs of ice cream and watching endless love movies were not extremely difficult, but it is not necessarily the hardest break-up.
Yes, it is the first time someone sees the part of you that no one else has. You become closer to someone than you ever thought possible, and they see all of you, every part. But without this dramatic, awful ending, as most first love break-ups end in, there would never be your best love.
The best love picks you up from that cynical hole you have climbed into and thought you would never escape from. The roller coaster of your first love was likely filled with jealousy and times you loved each other so much that you hated each other because you simply did not know how to handle the emotions you had never felt before. The best love shows you the only way to love is with love. You have finally learned how to be in a relationship, and you are the best version you can be for them. Your best love shows you complete happiness, unlike the roller coaster ride with the first. You finally are old enough to understand how to balance being a significant other along with all of your other interests instead of putting too much focus in certain areas, you have it all down.
That is why it hurts so bad if you lose your best love, because you gave it your all and it was not enough. The best love is the one you truly believed could work. The promises made with your first love eventually seemed crazy; but with your best, you truly meant every word you said. While in this relationship, you finally knew how to balance everything in your life and how to not only love someone else but love yourself; and it hurts when they stop loving that best version of yourself.
The best love one of the biggest losses you can face. So, I strongly advise, if you find your best love, do not dwell on your first love. Learn to let go of that first love you were so focused on -- because it opens you up not only to better guys, but to the possibility of being a better you and to learning from your mistakes.
If you do lose your best love, I’m sure the new best is just a few tubs of ice cream away.
