If you can’t handle Chris Evans’ beauty, this movie is not for you. Obviously, Chris Evans is the star of the movie, so his loveliness is everywhere. Chris is naturally one of the hottest guys in Hollywood, and us fans wait patiently for him to be named sexiest man alive. If you decide to bite the bullet and see the movie, bring tissues…for your drool. Heart eyes emojis everywhere!
Black Widow does not spike your desire to be a complete boss. Scar-Jo is a life boss but if you don’t think so, stop reading this. Her “power” is essentially just being amazing and inspiring for complete radicalness. She holds the troops together like a strong woman. Dear geez she’s great.
Laughing in a superhero is most inappropriate. If you have ever seen an "Avengers" Marvel movie, you know that humor is a huge draw. Other superhero movies, such as "Batman" and "Superman," do not contain such comicality. There is nothing amusing about explosions lighting up the sky, and people attempting to kill each other. Not funny at all! Yet, thoroughly entertaining.
Robert Downey Jr.’s sass is too much. The man with the Tom Ford suit and an iron suit. RDJ’s character,Tony, is a bossy boot with an attitude comparable to a toddler. Tony is always right because he’s the smartest and richest and he has the persona to compliment it. Tony does not always understand the gravity of things so you might not think highly of his personality. But we secretly love him (and his extreme beard trimming precision.)
Positive endings do not float your boat. Serious movies do not end with rainbows and roses. While happy is a stretch, this movie does not leave you in despair because the presidential election is doing that enough. Marvel appreciates the aspect of happy endings and we love that! Even though you might not.
Falcon/Sam’s bird costume looks ridiculous. We were introduced in Captain America 2 to the slow poke Sam. He moseyed his way up to becoming an official Avenger, but as “Agent 13” points out, what’s up with the bird costume? The wings longer than his height come out of essentially nowhere. Then other things come out and it’s a heap of confusion. If you don’t think it’s crazy and awesome, this movie is, once again, not for you!
You are not amused by Scarlet Witch’s powers. She is very destructive with the red neuron things swirling around in her hand, and we have no freaking idea what it is. The face she makes is questionable, she makes you nervous and she pops out of thin air at the right time, of course. You think this sounds super lame and cheesy and typical, so don’t see it. We’ll see it at least three more times.
These romances have you confused and nauseated. What’s a movie without romance all around? Who is interested in who varies from one movie to the next, so if you don’t see them all you can’t keep up. It’s a lot of trouble being a Marvel fan. It doesn’t get risqué either, just another reason why it’s so loved.
You have zero interest in seeing the new "Spiderman." They have already been two movies in the "Spiderman" series in the last 14 years, so why on Earth would we reintroduce him? Let’s just say he is played by an adorable 19-year-old, gets recruited by Tony and its instantaneous love whether you wanted it or not. So if you don’t want to love him, there’s a reason not to go.
You don’t even like Marvel movies. Every Marvel movie is exactly the same because it’s just like another other series, minus the fact that it’s not and they are all different! Didn’t like "Thor 2"? "Captain America 3" has absolutely nothing in common. So that’s that.
Movie bars were raised to an unimaginable height after the release of the movie, and it deserved it. There are no real reasons not to see it unless you are just that much of a stinker.
