We’ve all seen it. Plastered all over social media are photographs of all those “perfect” couples cuddling and kissing, videos of them singing in the car, pictures showing off the expensive gifts they shower each other with, and screenshots of the cute messages they text each other. And now we’ve created a term for such couples… “Relationship goals.”
Today, too many people are going into relationships for all the wrong reasons. We are obsessed with showing off on social media, vying to be the perfect couple that everybody envies. Our heads have been filled with these fake portrayals of what relationships should look like for so long that now the expectations are all wrong. And when we go into relationships expecting it to live up to what we have seen on social media, we end up disappointed.
Every individual is different, so it makes sense that every relationship is unique. Some couples may love being outdoors, while others would prefer a night of Netflix and cuddling. Some get serious faster than others. And some are more private than others. While one couple may love posting pictures with each other once a day, some might rarely even use social media. That being said, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being proud of your relationship, but the fact still stands that social media posts should definitely not be at the center of it. You should not want to have a girlfriend or boyfriend just because you want to try to be “relationship goals.”
To say a couple is “relationship goals” is to say that you are literally striving to make your relationship like someone else’s. Now, this wouldn’t be a problem if your goal is to have a fundamentally healthy and loving relationship, but what is typically admired are the completely superficial aspects of couples. Why is your goal in a relationship to take cute pictures with someone? Why is your goal to have someone buy you roses and take you on fancy dates? Why is your goal to have someone post a picture of you with the caption “woman crush Wednesday” or “man crush Monday” every week? There are far more important things to be looking for like, I don’t know, maybe trust, support, respect…
Aim to find someone who genuinely loves you and treats you the way you deserve to be treated. Remember that as far as social media goes, you only see what people want you to see. Anyone can make their relationship seem perfect on Instagram, while in reality it may be struggling. Why should it matter if anyone else thinks you’re a cute couple? If someone truly makes you happy, there shouldn’t be a need for constant affirmation from others.
Just because your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t post how much they love you all over social media, it doesn’t mean their feelings are any less strong. Love is original, and it takes many shapes and forms. And love is not measured in Instagram likes, Twitter favorites, or Facebook shares. So give up on the expectations you have set in your mind based on what you’ve seen, and start looking for something real. Because when you find it, you’ll look back and wonder why you were ever so obsessed with “relationship goals.”
