We've all heard it before, whether from our friends or in movies and TV shows. Maybe you've even said it yourself. It's become such a dreaded and loathed phrase. What is it? The friend zone.
This is how I feel every time I hear someone say friend zone:
Is that too sassy? I'm (just a little) sorry. But it's just as overused and annoying as YOLO. And I just really don't think the "friend zone" is a real thing.
When people talk about the friend zone it sounds like some type of purgatory. I guess in a way it is. You're stuck between being just a friend and a romantic interest, and that just sounds so ridiculous.
Why is this a thing? This is going to sound harsh, but the person that puts someone in the "friend zone" simply just isn't interested. And I'm not trying to be mean, it's just a fact. They just want to be friends, and they probably have made that known. If someone is leading you on, they might be doing it unintentionally. That unfortunately happens sometimes. But if they are purposefully leading you on, then they suck and are someone you shouldn't be with anyway.
And dare I say that guys usually say it more than girls? Why? Is it that bad that a girl doesn't return your affections? I'm sorry, she doesn't.
I see how them just wanting to be friends makes the friend zone feel like a real thing, but it's just created in our heads. They just want friendship, plain and simple. If they wanted more than that they will and should be upfront about it. It can be hard, just try to be careful. Friend zone makes friendship sound so negative. But friendship is awesome and something that should be celebrated!
It really, really sucks to develop feelings for someone and not have them returned. I've been there, you've been there, we've all been there. But putting the blame on the other person for not returning your feelings honestly isn't fair. And creating this friend zone category to place yourself in is demeaning to yourself. The person didn't put you there, you did.
Not everyone is going to like you. It's tough, but it's really just how life is. It applies to romantic and non-romantic interactions. They can't really help that they don't share a mutual romantic feelings. They might just be looking for a friend. And that is perfectly fine that you guys were looking different things. Hopefully friendship is still possible, but maybe it isn't. Just give it time to see. It might turn out friendship is the best option for both people.
Don't give up, the right person is out there for you.