Online dating has really taken off in the last ten years. With sites from OKCupid and Match.com hauling in big money, it’s no wonder that many people find this as an acceptable alternative to talking to people in real life.
Chances are, if you’ve used the internet to do the long distance thing, it hasn’t worked out. This is because there are functional differences between how a relationship works in real life and online. Here are five reasons why this form of dating might not be for you.
5. There’s no physical contact.
Skype calls can only go so far, and while phone calls can be nice, you can only get so close to that person before you hit a wall.
There’s no holding hands, there’s no cuddling or kissing, or sex. You can’t see his or her smile unless it’s through the choppy frame rate of Skype. You can’t notice all the small details that make him him or her her when you interact with them.
There is simply no way to get to know all of your significant other’s quirks when you are confined by distance. You can eventually learn their style of texting, though.
4. Text is an awful way of communicating.
Because not everyone in America has unlimited data or a stable wifi connection, if you date online, you’ll probably be texting a lot.
When you text, there are no tones. When you want to be sarcastic, it can easily come off as offensive. Anything that can be taken the wrong way can and will offend someone. If you have a pronounced personality, you will have to sterilize it for the text medium, else you risk a lot of unnecessary fights.
The only way you can avoid this is if you met your significant other in person before going long distance, but even that doesn’t transcend the limitations of text.
3. You’ll never know if they cheat.
This has happened to me, and man does it suck. It’s so easy to hide what you’re doing online, especially if you and your partner live miles away. You might not find out anything was up until months after the fact, because again, texting is a shitty line of communication, and it’s so easy to limit your interactions with this person online.
There are no ways of keeping tabs on them, without reverting to stalking. All you can do is trust them and hope that they are worthy of your trust.
2. That spark can be lost.
If you had a spark with a person in real life, it can easily be lost online. The two methods of communication (face to face, real life versus all online communication) host very different discourses, and you might find that you can’t connect to that person in the same way you did in person.
Some people also have very different online personas. Someone who is preppy and cheerful could come off as petty and awkward through text. Video voice chat software can help remedy this, but to a point.
1. You can’t go on dates.
While you’re online, there’s no way you can physically bring that person on an adventure and have a connection. Going places and experiencing the world is the best way to fall in love with somebody, we call them dates. You learn more about who they are, you learn to love all their little quirks, and they slowly become a part of you.
You can’t do that behind a computer, no matter how good your imagination is. If you want your relationship to work at some point you’re going to have to go on a date with them, and that requires person-to-person interaction.
Do you agree with my list? Comment below why you think online relationships work of don’t work!
