Why It Is Okay To Love Differently
Start writing a post

It is okay to be the person in the relationship who gives love the most. It is equally okay to be the person who receives love the most in the relationship. Everyone loves differently, just like everyone has different gifts in life. Loving someone differently, or requiring a different kind of love is not a bad thing. I was always jealous of the girls who were able to love their significant other “easily.” I was always one to love people loudly, boldly, intensely, and with all my heart. I have commonly thought that there was something wrong with the way I love people that I somehow needed to tone my love down. However, after reading Gary Chapman’s book, "The Five Love Languages," I achieved a greater understanding that everyone loves a little differently, and there is nothing wrong with that. The most important thing we can do is to try and understand how our significant other or people around us like to be loved.

Chapman states that there are five emotional love languages that most people identify with: words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, receiving gifts and acts of service.

Words of affirmation is simply just compliments or acknowledgment of the hard work your significant other has done. These compliments have a wide range that can consist of, “I love your hair” to “Thanks for always taking out the trash for me.” No matter what you say, this language is always based on affirming what your significant other did, in a positive light.

Quality time is simply spending time with your significant other, whether it be taking time out of your day to always text them good morning and good night, going out on dates or simply just being in the same room with them reading a book, while they watch a show. Time is the most important thing you can give to a person whose love language is quality time.

Physical touch is a love language that is used without words. Some people crave physical touch and some people would rather be in a personal bubble. However, it is important to realize that if your significant other’s love language is physical touch, you do not have to be constantly touching or kissing them. Physical touch is sometimes simply just sitting close together on the couch or always making it a point to touch your significant other on the back as you walk in a room.

Receiving gifts is a love language all about receiving a token that your significant other can look at proudly and think, “He was thinking about me.” A gift does not have to be anything expensive at all, it can be something as simple as a handwritten note. Your significant other just needs something concrete to hold onto to fill up their love tank.

Acts of service is a love language that requires someone to love another person boldly. Acts of service consist of driving your significant other to work every day because he or she does not like to drive, it can be driving 30 minutes away just to pick up their favorite movie for date night or it can be as simple as cleaning up the kitchen after a hard day at work. You must make sure to do these things with a positive spirit however, or else it may not seem like an act of service, but more like an act of burden.

Learning your significant other’s love languages are important. A lot of the time people like to love each other how they want to be loved, however, if you strive to love someone how they need to be loved, you will realize how much stronger your relationship is. A lot of times in a relationship people realize they are not communicating properly, what they do not understand is that seldom do significant others have the same love language. Explain to your significant other what you need, and have him or her explain what you need. Knowing your love languages can not only change your relationship but your life.

Here is the link to find out what your love languages are: 5 Love Languages quiz

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Peter Truong

If you still have not figured out what you want to cook on Thanksgiving, baked macaroni and cheese is something worth considering. It is simple, affordable, and delicious. I have had many different types of baked mac and cheese and most are dry. I do not like a dry mac and cheese, it just does not seem appealing to me. If you like the creamy cheesy essence of mac and cheese, look no further, this recipe is for you.

Ingredients:

Keep Reading... Show less

As a first-year college student, I've been doing a lot of meeting and introducing myself to people, often with the classic format of "name, hometown, major".

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

This Simple 7-Step DIY Face Mask Combines Safety — And Sustainability

Instead of studying like I intended on doing today, I made a face mask for some reason and thought I'd share how I did.

41654

If you were looking for a simple way to make a mask, I am happy to share how I personally make them. I have a pretty small face in general, so I prefer having my homemade ones so they fit better. This is also a great alternative to just throwing away any clothes! Before starting, you will need to make sure you have fabric, thread, a needle, and pins; if you have a sewing machine, you obviously could use that instead of hand sewing it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

6 Ways To Handle The Stress Of Earning Your Degree From Your Childhood Bedroom

Oh so this was the room where I snuck cookies upstairs past my bedtime and stole R-Rated movies to watch when my parents were asleep and now I'm expected to earn my degree in this very same room?

21069
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

It's definitely not easy, but it's something so many kids are struggling with right now.

Keep Reading... Show less

November is such an underrated month. With all the excitement that comes with Halloween ending and the holiday season around the corner, some people skip over it and go straight to their Christmas playlist. For me though, November is the perfect time to compile a playlist of songs that bring on major nostalgia which I think is perfect for this time of year. If you're looking for something to get you in that thankful spirit before you head into the Christmas spirit or something to play while you enjoy Friendsgiving, here are some go-to songs to add to your November playlist.

Keep Reading... Show less

Taylor Swift is famous for her Easter eggs on social media that hint at what is coming next for her. Over the past few days, fans noticed a change in Swift's hair when she was accepting her win as Apple's songwriter of the year that was reminiscent of the "Red" era. Of course, this has caused widespread speculation that Swift has begun to re-record her masters.

Keep Reading... Show less

While joyful, the holiday season can also be stressful for many and that's A-O.K. Plus, with the added tension that is 2020, this year's holiday season is a lot, to put it simply.

This is your reminder to put yourself first and listen to what you're yearning for. Deep down, you know what you need to thrive and I know that you can get there.

Keep Reading... Show less
Swoon

25 'Open When' Topics And Ideas For That Special Someone In Your Life

Open When Letters are letters you can give to your special someone.

5869
Lauren McCally

Stuck on what to get the person you love the most?

And, well, let's be honest, is hard to shop for? Well then, why not send them some Open When Letters?

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments