We've been conditioned to tiptoe.

We've been conditioned to mute our feelings to justify another's. To do so, we flower our language and decorate our tone to make it more pleasing. There are Google results for "how to say no to plans without saying no." You can click on links that echo the sentiment of being an "asshole" for saying no. We protect the other person's feelings by muting our own.

Women who are assertive in what they want are seen as bitches. Low-level workers are seen as greedy for asking for a raise. African-Americans are under assault for sticking up for their compromised rights.

What do these figures all have in common?

They possess a vocabulary that isn't hidden behind any sort of visage. They use words that are point-blank: they want and demand specific things. They don't desire or ask. These are the go-getters in our society who are inappropriately labeled negatively.

So my question is why. Why are we, as a society, so quick to tear down the people who are clearly trying to ameliorate some portion of their lives? Why are we afraid of phrases that don't beat around the bush, that cut straight to the point? Why are we afraid of confrontation?

The only reason that I can conjure is that we are afraid of judgement. As a result, being around those who aren't and aren't afraid to tell us what they want is uncomfortable--and we tend to avoid as many uncomfortable situations as possible.

My piece of advice to you is to embrace the uncomfortable situations in your life. We can't grow when we become entrenched in our comfort. Start small: when someone asks you where you want to eat, don't respond with, "I don't care, anything is good." Say what's on your mind. If you want Mexican food, go to Qdoba; if you want Italian, go to Vitales. What're the consequences for saying what you want?

Then you can start to grow. You'll grow enough confidence to tell that guy who keeps messaging you that you aren't interested in having a relationship. You'll be able to stand up for yourself. Perhaps for your rights, very well could be for your wants because you will begin to learn what you want from life.

But in order to get to those points, you have to realize that you someone feels should not, rather, does not dictate how you act. It is not anyone else's job to like you but yours. It is not selfish or greedy to know what you want, though society may try to tell you otherwise. That's just because we've been conditioned to tiptoe around other's feelings, to place another's feelings above our own. Which is not always a bad thing, but in today's society, it's become the norm to do so constantly.

So next time you see someone being passionate, ambitious, and engaged without restraint, resist the urge to knock them down. Listen to what they're demanding. Wonder why. Look to see how you can learn from them and grow.