Let's talk about feminism.

For all the progress we have made, there are still a lot of misconceptions about feminism out there. One of the largest and most damaging stereotypes is that feminists want women to be more powerful than men. There are also some “feminists” out there who want equality for some women, but not others. Both of these are not the norm, nor are they actually feminists. "The norm" is just someone who thinks that everyone should be equal. It really is as simple as that. A feminist is simply someone who believes in the equality for both sexes, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, etc…

Feminism is not all bra burning women who don’t shave or wear makeup. There are plenty of feminists who love wearing makeup and shaving. There are, of course, those who don’t. And it shouldn’t matter one bit. If I want to cut my hair shorter than many men, that’s my decision. If I don’t want to shave and let my armpit hair grow as long as my dad’s, that’s my decision. If I want to wear more makeup than you think is appropriate, that’s my decision. It shouldn’t matter one bit what anyone else chooses to do with their appearance, because it is not affecting you in any way. It also seems ridiculous that many brush off feminists by their appearance, when that is one of the main things we are trying to correct. Women are more than a pretty face or body for you to sexually objectify. Also, a feminist does not have to be a woman. As previously stated, a feminist is anyone who believes in equality for all. That’s really all there is to it.

The term Feminazis is more than ridiculous. First of all, the fact that it is not recognized as a real world in the English language should be a pretty big clue. Secondly, comparing feminists to Nazis seems like a pretty big stretch to me. The definition of a feminist, as stated over and over again, is someone who believes in equality for all. Obviously, Nazis did not believe in equality for all. They believed in one superior and dominant class. Coming from the misconception that feminists believe women should be more powerful, it is understandable how the term originated. However, it is also completely and utterly wrong.

Also, the matter of equal pay is just the tip of the iceberg, though it is true that women are still not making as much as men. Depending on race (also problematic) women make anywhere from around 55 to 75 cents to a man’s dollar. Women who have a child or children or who are expecting are less likely to be hired than a man with a child. In too many cases, the victim is blamed. This really starts when gender roles are perpetuated in schools (i.e.: dress codes—girls can’t wear tank tops because they are a DISTRACTION. These girls are CAUSING the boys to be distracted because they are SEXUAL OBJECTS and must be seen as such. It is okay to see boys topless, but GIRLS must always wear long pants, long sleeves, and a paper bag over their head. OTHERWISE she is dressing like a slut and is clearly asking for it.) Obviously that was sarcasm to emphasize a ridiculous concept, but I feel like I have to point it out because there are some people who really think that way. Most women are scared to walk alone at night (for good reason). Women are scared to reject men because other women have been killed for doing just that. Women and YOUNG GIRLS (mainly but not entirely in other countries) are being forcibly married—sometimes to their rapists. Girls and women are being sold into sex trafficking. I really could go on forever about all the problems that we still need to fix, but it’s exhausting.

So what do we do about it? It starts by changing our dialogue. It starts with us choosing to be more aware of how we speak about others, especially women talking about other women. It starts by not judging another woman for making different decisions than you.

We can change the way things are; all we have to do is try.