I usually don't discuss religion and my personal beliefs with anyone, not even my close friends. It has always been a touchy conversation with my family, so I just avoid it all together. If anyone else feels like this, I'm letting you know now that you're not alone. Growing up one way and living your adult life in a completely different way is normal, and this is exactly what happened to me.
From grades kindergarten through seventh, I attended a small private Catholic school. And by small I mean I only have around 45 kids in my graduating class. While attending private school, I had to go to church every Sunday and every other Wednesday. I took a religion class every year and most of our activities revolved around a Catholic theme. As a student there, religion was stuffed down my throat and I couldn't escape it, but at the time, that was normal. And then I went home and we prayed every morning, before every meal and before we went to bed.
There was no escaping practicing being Catholic when I was growing up, and I wasn't exposed to anything different until later. After seventh grade, my family packed up and moved, and I was transferred to a public school which had a graduating class of roughly 400 kids. This was a huge transition for me, but there isn't one day where I'm not glad this happened to me. Going from private to public school allowed me to see that there is a lot more out there than what I was exposed to in private school. I took a course in high school called AP World History, and there I learned about the many different religions that are practiced around the world, and that was when I began to question my faith.
My initial thinking was how I was forced to grow up only learning about one religion that my parents wanted me to learn, which is fine, but it made me think about how my religion could be the only "right" one to practice when there are so many other ones out there. Having me step back from practicing being a Catholic made my family upset. I stopped going to church every Sunday with my family and this caused many arguments. I finally got my parents to realize that I am my own person and that I need to figure out how I want to live my own life.
Growing up one way and exploring different lifestyles when you're an adult is okay. It's normal. That's how I learned and developed into the person I am today. Another point I want to make is that being Catholic isn't awful or terrible. I am in no way trying to put that certain religion into a bad light; I am simply saying I wanted to explore my options. I am grateful for everything in my life and I am happy with who I am!
