“Hey mom…I signed myself to go on a trip to the UK in like six months. I hope that’s ok.”

For the rest of my days I will remember my mother’s face when I told her that her home-bodied, anxiety ridden son had willingly signed himself up to go to a foreign country. The look of absolute shock that played across her face was priceless. She was clearly thinking, “Who is this kid and what has he done with my child?”

My father had a similar reaction when he came home from work that night. Now don’t get me wrong, my parents were extremely happy for me and glad to see that I was leaving my comfort zone (which consisted of my room at the time). But for a kid who was nervous to even go on a weekend vacation, this totally blindsided them.

I’ve dealt with anxiety since the day I was born. My mother tells stories of how I needed to be the first person to arrive at events so I wasn’t overwhelmed with people, or how I needed to know all the details ahead of time like who was going, how many people would be there, and when things started and ended. The list could go on and on. Truly it dominated the majority of my life, entrapping me in a state of constant fear to the point where walking through the mall was an issue. Truth be told, I probably wouldn’t have gone on this trip if I didn’t have friends going. Meeting new people at the time terrified me and without their support I wouldn’t have even been able to go to the meeting where I signed up.

But all of that changes when you leave everything you’ve known.

One of the critical problems people experience when coping with anxiety is that it consumes you. It wraps you inside of this cocoon of fear that becomes your world. Every waking moment is spent inside this twisted perspective and the only way to escape is to shock that perspective. And what better way to do that then to forget the one thing that makes us human and relearn it different than our past life, culture..

Landscape and architecture are absolutely wonderful, there's no mistaking that. But you will find beautiful places everywhere, and that's not to say they shouldn't be admired and cherished, but it is the deconstruction and then reconstruction of our culture that is truly an amazing experience.

During this period of deconstruction and reconstruction I forgot my anxiety. I saw beyond the twisted perspective that had been dominating my sight and mind and for the first time tasted what it was like to live a life where I was the product of culture and history. A life where I wasn't controlled by an illness of my mind. And by all means was it worth fighting for.

I encourage anyone with anxiety to fight through that initial fear and take an out of country trip. I promise you that the experience will reshape your life in the most positive ways possible. Don't let the fear control you. Break from the view that has haunted you all your life and see the world as it was meant to be seen, Vibrant and filled with beautiful differences.