The next time you look at your boyfriend consider this: your daughters will date as you do. If your type is kind, intelligent, and thoughtful, so will your daughter's. If you like 'em unpredictable, bad-boy, aggressive, so will your daughter.
She chooses boyfriend qualities she grows up around because they are the behaviors and attitudes she has learned to expect — good or bad.
The man you expose her to is her male role model.
Choose an honest, hard-working, loving, self-respecting man because you are choosing for the both of you.
Is He a Builder or a Destroyer?
Once you decide who to marry and have children with, that man molds your baby's world and future. Your baby's daddy will build up her self-esteem or dissolve it away completely. He will model the behavior and treatment your baby will expect from men.
Does he treat you with love and respect? Your daughter will date men who treat her the same way. Your son will treat women this way. They will actively seek out people who fit this behavioral model and who recreate the same feelings.
Happy or Resentful Children
If you pick a man who doesn't stick around, his children can grow up angry, resentful, and with lower self-esteem because they feel unworthy. The way he handles adversity reveals more about his character than his personality in good times. A well-chosen man fills his children with love and confidence. Happier, they go forth into the world positively affecting all they meet. What a way to make a long-term difference in the world! You did that. You can make that difference with your choices.
The Long View
When you view your potential life partner through this lens, it increases the significance of their actions and attitudes. If you tell yourself he didn't mean it, I deserved his anger, I guess it will be better tomorrow, imagine your daughter telling herself the same things about her man. Do you want that? Or do you want better for her? Your choices will be her choices.
Choose wisely because you both deserve the best.
