Who Broke Your Heart First? | The Odyssey Online
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Who Broke Your Heart First?

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Who Broke Your Heart First?

I have had 2 dads, and not one of them decided that I was enough for them to stick around. Starting new families with new babies and new marriages. And I wasn't involved in any of it. I remember wondering everyday why I was never enough for my biological dad to love me like he loved his new family. Or wondering why my adoptive dad was my best friend one day and the next he was remarried with 3 new pretty baby girls, and I wasn't a part of it. I still wonder these things every once in a while, but not everyday anymore. It took me a long time to realize that because of them I now have a relationship with my mom that wouldn't have been possible without them leaving. I realized that my brother Austin is my best friend in the world and the only real father figure I have had to actually show me what it is suppose to be like to be loved by the first man in your life (your father) and even though Austin wasn't my father, he was so much more than that for me. The first man to ever break my heart was my dad when I was 13. And I used to resent him for it. But now I am thankful that he left when he did, because of him I know exactly who I want to be and who I do not, I want to be remarkable and loving and careful of other peoples feelings. All the things that he was not. I want to be a good parent like my mother and my brother. Something that he was not to me. But most importantly I want to be happy because that is something that I deserve and that is something that he does not.

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