Some of you are probably familiar with Lysa Terkeurst's book "Uninvited." If you aren't, you should become familiar with it. A close friend of mine gave it to me as a gift, and it has unveiled countless lessons that I remember daily. I wanted to touch on one particular chapter that Terkeurst writes. This chapter revolves around grace. Grace is the one thing we are all so good at, right?! Well, unless you're God or Mother Teresa, you probably laughed pretty hard at that sentence.
Grace is really stinking hard to grasp. Like really hard. Especially when we have undoubtedly been wronged by someone. Maybe it is the father who was never great at his role? Maybe it is the friend who walks all over you and forces you to tears too frequently? Maybe it is the person who cheated on you? Maybe it is the mean group of students or coworkers who look down on you and make you feel less than wanted? Maybe it is the person who took from you what you hadn't offered for the taking? I know for me, in difficult times like these, I feel like a victim. I hurt and I question and I ache over what has happened. Whatever it is, situations like this make it incredibly hard to hold onto grace.
I know personally, when I am hurt, I don't always say the nicest things. I don't always wish happiness on that particular person. I am human. Naturally, I want that person to hurt like they made me hurt. Terkeurst explains it beautifully. We can either hold a box of nasty, smelly clippings, or a box of beautiful, white lilies. We can either hold a box of bitterness or a box of grace. And what we hold is what we hand to others.
Do we want to be seen holding and handing out items from the box of nasty clippings or the box of lilies? Though it is easier said than done, I want to hold and share the lilies. I want to take my smelly situation and turn it into something beautiful. I so badly want to grasp onto grace.
The saying "Life's not fair" is beyond true when it comes to grace. More often than not, the person we pour grace upon is undeserving of it. I don't doubt that he or she wronged you. I don't doubt that their actions were sinful, hurtful, and distasteful. I would even go as far as to say that what they did to you made you feel broken and lost. So why give them grace if we can admit in every direction that this person was absolutely in the wrong? Because God gave us grace, and continues to give us grace every single day. And to follow the Lord is to want to be more like Him.
My favorite line from Uninvited is this: "It's impossible to hold up the banners of victim and victory at the same time." We cannot play the victim while also shouting victory to those around us. It is one or the other. Either we shrink or we overcome. This is the posture I want to have on a daily basis. I want to hold the box of lilies. I want to forgive and grab grace so tightly that I cannot help but fall in love with its beauty and rewards.
Having grace isn't easy. It is a choice we have to consciously fight for every day. Our flesh will want us to seek revenge. We will naturally want to play the victim. Instead, however, try and realize that losing that battle with ourself can allow us to win in another sense. We will be drawn closer to the Lord, and at the same time, that hurt we felt initially will fade much faster. God protects us when we take cover under His promises. Be victorious today, not a victim.
