We've all been there before, your parents let you know that'll be leaving you alone for the weekend so that they can get away. You practically kick them out the door and push their car out of the driveway from all the excitement of being alone for an entire weekend.
You immediately start watching "Project X" and "Superbad" with a pen and paper trying to learn how to throw the perfect party to show off to your high school friends how "college" you are now. You run through the entire weekend in your head, and it all works out. Perfectly. The only problem? The expectations are very rarely reality.
Expectation: Everybody is going to show up.
You're ready to accept the role as Lord of Party for the weekend and 100 percent willing to sacrifice your parents' house as tribute. You start hitting up EVERYBODY: Your main squad, the B-team, that kid who's trying to be a rapper, the cute girl that rejected your promposal but hasn't seen you (or your widely admired dad bod) since last summer and anybody else that will show up. You know that without people actually coming, it'll just be another crappy weekend, so you make it open invite and hope for the best.
Reality: Everybody has a life now.
Unfortunately, for all us wannabe McLovins out there, it turns out our friends have lives now. It didn't occur to you when your parents told you a month ago they'd be leaving for the weekend that you should've told your friends to take that weekend off too. So while everybody is out working, you're sitting at home making awkward small talk with the "rapper" and his "producer."
Expectation: Everybody will respect your things.
10 o'clock rolls around and everybody starts to get out of work. Finally the night can get started. A few people show up, and it looks like it'll actually be a good night. Sure, there are a few people you don't actually know that showed up, but hey, the more the merrier. The night is starting to peak, everybody is staying downstairs, and there's no puke on the floor. You feel like a God among men, and your parents will never know.
Reality: Nobody cares.
The five friends that actually showed up each brought their roommate from school, and even though you're a little nervous, you can't let your title as Party King go. A few hours and more than a few too many drinks in and suddenly these kids turn into absolute animals. Before you know it there are three holes in your wall, your dog is spray painted and some random kid is pissing himself in your parents' bed.
Expectation: The next night will be twice as legendary.
Now that everybody knows where party central is, and they have time to call out of work, your legacy can finally be made. You're one party wiser and made some necessary adjustments to make sure the night can live up to the hype. You've got a fire playlist (that rapper's mixtape really was fire), plenty to eat and drink and a bonfire going to keep everybody outside.
Reality: Nope.
After last night, turns out you're content with never having anybody over to your house again.
