It’s no secret that kids can be brutally honest. In fact, they can be downright mean, and make you question an outfit, an action, or pretty much anything. Kids are lucky because they can speak their minds openly without worrying about too many repercussions. They don’t care if what they say is politically correct or not. They don’t care if you don’t like what they have to say, or if you agree with them. Kids just say what they are thinking and move on to the next topic, while you’re still trying to figure out where they learned this stuff from. There is something refreshing and hilarious about that, especially in this day and age.
I thought about all of the things that I have heard kids say that really got me, or others, in check. I even remember as a child, I told a guy that his shorts were way too short, which to this day I still wholeheartedly believe. I was just trying to keep it real and tell him what I was thinking. Where’s the harm in that, right?
I have made a small compilation of some of the things that I have heard kids say to me, and others, when it was almost impossible to not crack up. Without further ado:
“Your butt is as big as a patio!”
This lovely quote came from a 5-year-old I used to babysit back in high school. There’s something about having your butt compared to a slab of cement that will really get you motivated to work out.
“People are going to think you’re lonely if you keep taking selfies on Snapchat.”
This was said by my little sister with a straight face and the most matter-of-fact tone. I honestly had no clue how to respond. I mean, she was kind of right.
“Do you have dirt in your armpit?”
My friend was a camp counselor and got her armpit stubble called out by a camper. Sometimes your armpits get a five o’clock shadow! Hopefully, this kid has worked on his pickup lines since this incident.
“How much do you weigh anyway?”
This remark was said by yours truly. I have since learned that asking people how much they weigh is, in fact, not an appropriate conversation starter.
“Why do you have a boy’s haircut?”
This honest question was asked to a preschool teacher by one of their students.
“What are those lines on your face?”
A question every woman wants to hear!
“Look at that hobo!”
I live close to an elementary school and was walking home from class one day, minding my own business, and then this is what I heard. It was brutal.
“Your stomach is fat.”
This observation is an oldie but goodie. It’s a comment that’s quick but also cuts deep.
"When I grow up, I want big boobs like you, but without being fat like you."
This is almost a compliment, but definitely took a turn.
It’s pretty obvious that kids know how to get to the point when it comes to what they’re feeling or thinking. Children may be small, but their words are powerful. You have to admit, they know how to keep it real and not beat around the bush. I personally admire how blunt they are. Even if you get a blow to the ego, you have to admit that kids’ brutal honesty is pretty funny and, more often than not, spot on.
