I have been in my current relationship for almost eight years. Before the relationship, however, I had already began to build up an amazing friendship with the very same person. A lot of people will warn you against falling in love with your best friend, but if the past eight years have taught me anything, it's that there is no one I would have rather have fallen in love with. My time with her has taught me a lot about life, about love, and about just learning how to exist, from the small ways to the big. Now, I think I'll try to share those lessons with all of you.
1. You learn to be less afraid.
The world is a scary place. There are dangerous things and people you always want to protect them from. But sometimes, when you two go out and explore, and you watch them climb the great heights, after you squirm a little, when you think they might fall--you don't go to catch them. You stand back and watch, because by watching them, you're overcoming the fear.
2. Even the bygone becomes meaningful again.
You grow up, and certain things are just left behind: Days on the playground, running through toy stores and school field trips. But then they jump on the swing, and they're laughing like a child, and it all comes spinning back to you. And you don't feel so old anymore.
3. Small trips become adventures.
It's just an outdoor mall, a tourist trap full of overpriced food and overcrowded walkways. You know you came for some reason, but all of a sudden it doesn't matter. The errand becomes a series of beautiful moments, and everything else just blurs.
4. There is no bad moment.
They say they're not wearing make-up, or you say you haven't shaved in days. Sometimes you hide from the camera. But the years have given you too many red-eyed nights and comforting runny noses to care. You always see the friend you made underneath it all.
5. You love seeing them love.
You've come to know the cousins and uncles, grandma and nieces, and it means everything to you to know that they love her as much as you, and she loves them in return. You know there is always love around her.
6. You know how to let them go.
Sometimes they leave all the way across the world, but you know how to let them go. The days of coming and going as friends taught you how to wait, and how to always look forward to the day when you can go adventure together again.
7. The date is wherever you happen to be.
There are classy, dress-up dates, and then there are wherever-we-end-up dates, where messy wings can become a go-to for memories--the messier the sauce, the bigger the smiles.
8. You live through all of life's stages.
You've seen them cry through loss, and through change, and sometimes you do things to make them cry with happiness--like the first day she held the new puppy. The years have taught you a full range of emotions, and you're always waiting to experience more.
Every year teaches you more about the friendship you built all of that love on. You play more, you fight more, you travel more and you grow more. You catalog the memories, and you keep some just between the two of you. Because you've always kept one another's secrets, dreams and hopes sacred. You loved spending time together before you knew you were even in love. Through the laughs, the tears and all the bad jokes, you remember the day you first met, and you think, "I think we'll get along."
And now you don't know how to really get along without them. And that's what it's like to fall in love with your best friend.
