When I started at the University of Southern Indiana in the fall of 2016, I thought that was the place for me. I figured I was going to spend the next four years calling that place home.

Spoiler: that's not what happened.

I ended up filling out an application to Purdue University later in the spring semester. I was only filling it out to see if it was even possible for me to get into Purdue.

Two months later, I was sitting at Chick-Fil-A eating dinner with my family when I got the email from a Purdue academic advisor saying I now had a spot at Purdue. I had so many mixed feelings going through my body, but at the same time, I felt nothing. I felt numb.

It now became a reality that I had to decide on what I was going to do in my educational career. I felt incredibly terrified that I was going to make the wrong choice. Up until that moment I told my friends and sorority sisters not to worry because I was going to be coming back to USI in the fall, now I had to start breaking the news that I got into Purdue and that I was heavily considering transferring.

I asked for advice from so many people after getting accepted. I didn't know what to do. My heart felt torn. Half of me didn't want to leave my sisters, but the other half of me knew that maybe Purdue is the better place for me mentally and educationally. It took me almost the whole time frame that the university gave me to figure out what I wanted to do. I lost a lot of sleep on this decision and lots of tears were shed.

I ended up deciding to transfer.

I spent many days and nights laying in bed trying to figure out what to say and when the right time was to tell my sisters that I was not coming back. It took a long time, and I still don't know if what I said was the right thing, but it has to be at this point, right?

After deciding what to say to my sisters and closest friends, I finally felt like I was able to let the rest of my world know what had been happening in my life in the past few months.

As my summer started to come to an end, I began to become more unaware of if I had made the right choice by transferring to Purdue. As the semester starts up, I continued to feel this way.

There is a part of me that is always questioning the decision I made at the beginning of my summer.

Some days still feel like I made the wrong choice, while others are good. I know that eventually, I'll make friends and that I will love campus more than I already do and that I will be aware that I did the right thing by transferring, but today is not that day. I can feel that the day will be here shortly, though, and I just have to keep listening to my friends and continue to give it time.