A pushover is defined as an individual who is easily shut down or taken advantage of. Their ideas often go unheard of in favor of someone else’s, and this is often done to avoid confrontation. A pushover isn’t a weak-minded person, but someone who lacks the ability to stand up for themselves. Having been a pushover ever since I could remember, I’ve learned valuable lessons about human nature and sacrifice.
1. Humans are intrinsically selfish.
It is of human nature to think mainly of oneself, and this characteristic is inherent in every decision we make. All of our actions are taken in order to benefit ourselves, whether that be going out to eat (we need to eat) or calling up a friend (we crave reassurance). While it’s important to think of yourself, I think it’s also important to be mindful of how your decisions could affect others.
2. Avoiding conflict is not healthy.
A pushover often tries to avoid conflict as a way to ease their anxiety, but in the end, it only escalates it. Confrontation can't always be side-stepped, and it's of human nature to have differences in opinion. It's important to remember that a simple disagreement won't always result in a fight. Learning how to properly address differences teaches an individual about compromise, sacrifice and communication. You can't always get what you want, but you shouldn't have to sacrifice your desires every time your friend makes a decision for the both of you.
3. Bending to the will of others only overworks you and holds you back.
It's easy to lose sight of your own goals when you're constantly succumbing to your friend's desires, but this is dangerous. You're incapable of reaching your full potential if you never chase after what YOU want. In addition, it's tiring to appease everyone but yourself. At the end of the day, you can only depend on yourself, and if you're using up all of your energy to help others, you'll have nothing left to work to your own goals.
4. Don't sacrifice self-care.
It can be daunting to say, "No," but at times, it's necessary. If a friend is begging you to go out, and you want to stay in and catch up on quality "you-time", you're allowed to. Staying home to do absolutely nothing isn't a bad thing, in fact, it's healthy every once in a while. It's important to know when to say, "No," and to help just yourself.
