When I first left for college I knew I would be missing out on the day to day activities of my family back home. I was prepared to miss the family dinners, game nights, and movie nights because I knew I would be home for all of the important traditions. I knew that I would be there on Thanksgiving to watch my dad carve the turkey and help my mom make all the sides. I knew I would be able to see my sister’s face as she opened her presents on Christmas morning and watch the ball drop with her on New Years Eve. I thought that I would be there for all the important holidays, but I forgot about one very important holiday that I would be missing…. my little sister’s birthday.
My sister may be nine years younger than me, but she is one of my closest allies and my mini-me. Missing her birthday was not something that had crossed my mind when I left for college eight hours away from home. While she was eating her special birthday breakfast of French toast and bacon, I was in Dhall eating yogurt and getting some last minute studying in. When she was opening presents, I was opening a textbook in the lib. My parents sang happy birthday to her, and I sang along to Spotify. I wasn’t home to help make her day extra special. I was at college.
I had promised my sister that I would be there for all the important things. I broke that promise when I wasn’t with her when she turned 10. I missed her transition from single to double digits. I know that she understood why I couldn’t be there to celebrate, but I still let her down. A phone call to say “Happy Birthday” is no where near as special as telling her in person. I wasn’t able to give her a hug and spin her around. I didn’t make her birthday cake or video her blowing out the candles.
Not participating in the birthday traditions was hard, but it was harder to think about my little sister growing up without me there to watch. I’ve been there to witness all her major milestones, but now she is accomplishing so much without me. I am so proud of her but I hate not being there to cheer her on in her successes and offer advice during the tough times. She isn’t a baby anymore and is becoming more independent each and every day. I’m not there to watch her grow physically, mentally, and emotionally. Her 10th birthday reminded me of that.
I now know that I will cherish every moment I spend with her more. I want to make every day we are together as special as her birthday. The fact that I missed her birthday was sad and hard for both of us, but I know that there will be many more birthdays to spend with her and I’ll always be a phone call away if she needs me.
