What It's Like Being Non-Religious

I don't have a religion, which some people especially in the Midwest find weird. Most people are pretty chill about it, but some try take it upon themselves to try to "save my immortal soul."

For example, once I was on a walk, listening to my iPod and singing along to Hozier's "Take Me to Church." I had just gotten to the chorus and some lady I didn't know came up to me and said, "I don't know why but the Lord has asked me to pray for you, would you like to pray with me?" I, being slightly scared and not wanting to seem rude, agreed and played along. After her prayer ended, she thanked me and walked away. I just stood on the sidewalk, questioning whether or not I was dreaming.

I used to go to church when I was a little kid. My nana would take me to this Catholic church in downtown Lincoln. I remember not really understanding much, and would usually zone out. According to my nana, she stopped taking me to church because they started preaching about how "all gays are evil" and how "abortion is murder and all abortion clinics should be destroyed." She got up from the pew and told me that we were leaving. When I asked why she said, "Because I take you to church to learn how to love, not to hate." I was about five when that happened.

My parents came from religious backgrounds. My mom went to Catholic school until around her junior or senior year of high school, and my dad went to Lutheran school until he was in second grade, and went to a Lutheran church until he was 10 or 12. My parents are not religious people. My mom has always said that if we (my siblings and I) wanted to follow a religion, she would support us, and my youngest sister went to church for a while but stopped going.

I was the weird kid in elementary school. I had weird hair, wore weird clothes, had weird friends, acted weird. I was also probably one of the only kids in my class who didn't have a religion of some sort and to them that was really weird. My class was mostly Christian kids, with a couple of Muslim and Jewish kids. I remember once lying about going to church to try to fit in (didn't work, I was still an outcast). Kids would ask if I celebrated Christmas ("yes") and then ask how could I celebrate it if I didn't go to church ("my family gives presents and eats dinner"). Easter in my house is slightly more religious than Christmas only because we watch Jesus Christ Superstar.

Even now, it's weird being non-religious. Hastings College is affiliated with the Presbyterian church. I remember last year at Christmas in my ear training class being the only one who didn't know the song "Away in a Manger." Last week, the music department had a holiday party and had a Christmas sing-along and I and one other person were the only people who didn't know the words to the specifically Christian songs (like The First Noel or Come All Ye Faithful). Secular Christmas songs? In alright with, even though they annoy me. Religious Christmas songs? Out of my element.

At work it's a little better even though I'm still slightly uncomfortable with customers wishing me a merry Christmas. I appreciate the gesture, I really do, but something about it makes me uncomfortable.

I'm not saying religion is a bad thing. I don't think of myself as better than others because I don't have a religion. I understand why people would want religion in their lives, and I wouldn't hate anybody because of their religion.

I'm not religious, but I'm not an atheist, either. By definition, I'm most likely agnostic but I don't really use that word to describe myself. My beliefs are pretty much I believe in Something, that Something is out there, I believe in a concept of Hell but not so much Heaven, but whether that Something is God or the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I won't know until I'm dead.