Growing up and living in the same town for the first 18 years of my life, I never once thought that I would leave "home." I had a wonderful family, friends, pets, the beach, beautiful weather, a beautiful home and a beautiful life. Why would I leave the paradise I was living in? Because I knew I needed to.
I knew there was more for life to offer me than the same town I had been residing in, and while it's a beautiful place, my curious mind wanted more. I wanted something entirely different and I wanted to know that I could be okay starting over by myself. So rewind to three years ago and there I was in my room with boxes piling up and suitcases overflowing with clothes and 18 years of my life had been packed up — just like that. I was so terrified to leave and was questioning my decision every day. My decision to move 17 hours away was somewhat irrational as I hadn't given it much thought. I didn't know a single person to where I would be moving and wasn't familiar with the location.
My family dropped me off at my tiny dorm and for the first time in 18 years, I was really alone. I didn't have a friend I could phone up and meet with, and it felt so...so...lonely. My roommates were extremely kind when we first met, but they were strangers, so I didn't trust them. The last time I had to try to make friends was preschool and kindergarten, so this was all so new to me and for the first couple weeks, I had no friends. I missed "home" so much — all I wanted was to be with my mom and be sitting at the beach since that was so normal for me. But there was no mom and there was no beach and that was my reality. I thought I had made a horrible mistake.
But there was actually something so magical about all of this. Growing up, I have always heavily relied on my friends and family, but for the first time, all I really had was myself. I started exploring by myself, writing, trusting myself, making my own decisions, and taking advantage of the beautiful state I was living in. Moving away from "home" made me so much stronger emotionally because I started handling the obstacles life threw at me by myself. I didn't have my parents there telling me I needed to be doing my homework or studying — I had to be my own motivator, and that's exactly what I did.
I changed my life for the better when I moved. I changed certain aspects of my life and it felt like a fresh start when moving away. As I changed my life and started growing, I noticed many great relationships and opportunities forming as life got more normal and I had adjusted. I now get to experience snow and I never had in the past, and my god it is gorgeous. I learned that my previous "home" was not my whole world, it was a stepping stone in my life. I have kept old friendships and I now also have so many amazing new friendships that I think could be lifelong friendships. My relationship with my mom grew deeper when I moved away and so did my relationship with the Lord. In my new state, I turned to God and got baptized by myself and I am forever thankful for that day.
The beach was my home, but now so are the mountains. And as I write this, I realize that "home" isn't necessarily a place — to me it's more of a feeling. I feel more at home with myself than I ever have before. So if you're scared of moving to a new location - don't be. It's exciting and you'll learn more than you could ever imagine. Enjoy the ride.
