College comes with a lot of new transitions and what we see in the movies or on social media is not always how everything ends up in reality. Just last night I was watching a cheesy Hallmark movie. I love them but, I can guess the plotline every time because there is usually no variance in these films. They are feel-good features that always turn out having a happy ending. Yesterday evening as I sat and watched one, I just got a little annoyed. Thinking this is so classic; I already knew the ending before I started the film. Personally, that gets old and is no fun. Where is the ride or excitement of the film?

Well, you may not find any adventure in those Hallmark movies (not to discount them in any way...I still watch them), I just want to share some real-life advice because, I guarantee, my life and yours (if we're all being honest) don't look like a Hallmark film.

So, when coming into college don't worry that your life isn't like the movies or others social media pages. It really probably won't ever be that, often times you're just not viewing the full story anyways or it just isn't realistic. Know that there are so many NEW things and things unsaid especially in these transitioning phases, such as coming from high school to college. This is very normal, it's our societies norm just to not mention it sometimes. But, the best advice that I could give you is to figure YOU out, and to do this early.

If you don't, the world will do it for you. That sounds kinda weird but let me explain; If you as a person don't decide what is important to you and what you want your life to become then, your stuck with letting the world tell you what to do and what's important. Many people that I have talked to personally have been stuck by letting their world be controlled and affected by school, sports, grades, others opinions of them, their coach, social media, likes, and money. Which is very common because these are the worldly values and what many people would believe to be most important. However, I can be hard to find complete happiness is those things alone, if they dictate your life's directions.

Now, when I was told about this and learning who I was/wasn't I was told that the most common worldly values fall into three categories: seeking power/prestige, seeking possessions, and seeking pleasures. Which aligns with many of the examples I gave above from people that I have talked too. So don't worry, you're not alone if you value those things (its not wrong/bad). It is just important to think and prioritize what's most important to you and why. Make sure to know the why, because that's important. Hopefully, those will be the things that inspire you, challenge you, and make you live life to the fullest. If your wanting a to live an accomplish and full life then keep reading because there may be something more or different that you should be seeking.

So, now let's begin to talk about how to find that thing to make us feel happy and full.

Great topic, right! The thing is I can't tell you what that is, it isn't up to me. I don't want to push you in a certain way or tell you that (BLANK) is going to make you feel this way. You will know what it is when you find it so, just be on the search if you don't already know. Also while discussing the transition to college, or whatever phase your going through don't think you have to know exactly yet where or what you are supposed to be doing or, get down on yourself; Admit that it is overwhelming and then internally analyze why you are there and then try to figure it out from there.

Why are you truly there???

We are all attending school (or where ever you are at in life) for different purposes and that is OK, which is also why the environment of college is the perfect place for you to solidify who you want to be, what you want to do, and for growth. For example, in college, you may change your major 100 times or 0 times. Either way, its OK. But, you also can do this at any stage, so don't think your ever to old or young to make a new direction for yourself; people are dynamic and constantly changing.

To think and discover who you are, I recommend finding and listing out:

What your strengths are

What your talents and gifts are

What you enjoy doing

What you value

Analyze your environment (including your friends)

Make sure that your friends and the people you're surrounded by align with where/what you seeking. These people don't have to be on the exact same path as you but, the old phrase " you are, who your friends are" is so true. The people that you spend the most time with are the ones who inherently help shape you so, if you don't like what you are seeing, as hard as it might be branching out!

When you find the right friends you will know it. These are those people that are encouraging you and seeking to grow you as a person to be your best self. They will support you as well as keep you accountable for the goals you've set for yourself. Another important factor is that you want to trust them and, be able to tell them these important things. It's best to have people around that you can really talk to and have a solid relationship with. Plus life is sad and boring alone, so find friends we all need TRUE ones.

Anyways sorry for that little rant, now let's go back and think about the five prior points that I made before, which is really the advice I have for you. So, scroll up if you forgot them!! These 5 different things may look a little or a lot different from person to person. But, YES you have them. Everyone has purpose and talents! It's when you know that purpose you can achieve more and feel more fulfilled.

So, let's think about what you're doing. Take the opportunity to discover YOU and then seek what it is that makes you overflow with happiness. If what your doing doesn't align with the type of person that you are/ your values, if it isn't making you happy, or allowing you to use your strengths then try something new. Don't trap yourself in something that isn't you. Investigate Investigate Investigate. But, I do want to give warning that even as much figure out about yourself and plan for the future be aware that things might not always work out as we think they will. SO, just a forewarning for the future and a reminder to what I was saying earlier, life isn't like a Hallmark movie, things will get challenging and not always end picture perfect!

I can't stress that enough, life isn't always like the movies and pictures showcase it. Thankfully as a person that sees the glass half full; I remind myself and you should too, that we get the opportunity to keep adapting, learning, and working hard. This is great fortune and luck for us, because we don't have to ever stop being or growing. Personally, I believe life comes down to how you see the situation, and how you go about solving it. That's why life turns out so differently for everyone because we act upon what we see and we don't all have the same worldview. But, when life throws you a curve ball it's nothing that you can't handle!

So what is next once you have found your identity and have done your soul searching... Use those talents!!!

You probably already have an idea of who you are and what your good at so, utilize that and just work to keep growing. Use your knowledge and skills in that way that make you wake up feeling fulfilled. If you aren't feeling this way think about why not, and what's going to get you there. You're going to want to feel satisfied; because when times get tough you want that strong foundation, to not get discouraged, and to know how to pick yourself/your work up. Your talents and strengths will be challenging to see at times but, know that you have them will keep you focused and on track to continue pursuing them, rather than to give up. Life's full of choices but, if your happy and working your hardest then you just have to be content with that! When grounds get shaky, be ready to make choice:

1) Dig in deep or,

2) Quit

So, think. What suits you?

Quiting or failing, as some people would say, is not always bad. If it isn't making you truly happy or growing you don't be afraid to walk away but, be thankful for the experience. Then look for what is for you. As I'd say, in these "Non-Hallmark like" life moments, you are going to grow the most and they will help you. So get inspired because your journey has begun and, there is room to change or keep developing into that person that you want to wake up and be in the morning. Just so you know, This will be the person and the things that are worth fighting for, even when you're ready to quit.

Best wishes to all of you and as always thanks for reading. I hope this inspires and encourages to be YOU to the fullest; your someone that the world needs and, your here to do something so might as well live a fulfilling life and find out what that is!!!