Ever since the start of high school, I have worn makeup every day I have left my house. Granted, I am no makeup guru, but I do know the basics. YouTube tutorials are a life saver, but most of the time, I stick to a natural look.

Adding makeup to my morning routine meant having to get up earlier, but I felt it was worth it. With makeup on, I feel polished, presentable, and pretty. I feel noticeable.

Yet, for a variety of reasons, I decided to give up makeup this year for Lent. I was prepared that my lack of makeup would directly affect my self-confidence, but I couldn't be more wrong.

During all my years of trying new eyeshadow pallets and scourging through beauty blogs, I forgot that I was not meant to be perfect. Instead, I was meant to be authentic-myself-and confident in who I was created to be.

I turned to my Bible for reassurance before Lent began, and I couldn't find more assurance and love than in the words that God, who created me, wrote for me.

In Jeremiah 31:3, I was told I was loved, long before I ever put on mascara. In 2 Corinthians 3:18, I learned that I am being transformed by God to be more like Him every day. In Psalm 46:5, God told me He is with me every step of the way. With Him, I cannot fail.

And so Lent has started. Benefits are plenty. There is something freeing about being able to rub my tired eyes and not have to worry about black streaks of eyeliner all over my face. There is confidence felt in the assurance that people interacting with me get to see the real me-my personality and quirks, and not just what I look like. Slowly but surely, I am taking off a mask.

And no one has said anything.

Not one thing at work, school, nights out with friends, not out to eat, the movie theater, or in line at the grocery store.

As my normal interactions with people continue to take place, my confidence is growing. I am delighted in being seen for myself, and I am realizing that the weight I have carried all these years, "this need to look perfect", is not a shared burden with those in my life who are close to me. I am not being told by my friends that things have changed or that they notice I don't look right. No one has asked me if I am sick or tired.

I discovered that if I viewed makeup as a pallet of colors used to make ugly things beautiful, then I am doing makeup (and life) wrong. Makeup is a tool that should be used to magnify a beauty that already exists. It's a morning routine that shouldn't cover up or distract from the beauty that comes from within-confidence, self-esteem, and awareness of the fact that God doesn't make mistakes.

I learned that I want to be beautiful. That is why I started wearing makeup in the first place. My desire is still to be beautiful, but not like the pictures of Miss Universe, super models, or the photo-shopped images lining the checkout at the grocery store. I want to be beautiful for the way that I think and the crazy thoughts that run through my head that, with hard work and a lot of prayer from my friends upstairs, can be turned into a reality.

I want to be beautiful for the way I can make people smile and laugh and forget their worries, even if it's just for a little while. I don't want to be labeled as beautiful for something that will fade, whether that be my lipstick color or even my physical appearance in a more general sense. I want to be beautiful at a soul level, and that is something that cannot be attained by an eyeshadow shade.