I am not a size zero, but I am not plus size, I am not tall, but I am not short. My hair and makeup is not always perfectly done, my outfits are not fashionable every day, and my skin does not look like porcelain.
I am, however, a college student, a hard worker, a good friend, a sister, a daughter. I am a dreamer, a wannabe singer and actress, a writer. I am an ice cream fanatic, a lipstick lover, and a puppy enthusiast. I am a good person, a feminist, a peacemaker. I am a real woman.
Society is so obsessed with what a "real woman" looks like, it seems they have completely forgotten that we are living, functioning beings. We are constantly applauding women for speaking out about concepts like "body shaming" when we face issues such as inequality in the workplace for women. As a woman, I do understand the pressure from society to look a certain way, and don't mean to undermine the issue of body shaming. But I hate that as a society, we are more concerned for women not feeling as physically attractive as the select few women hand-picked for TV ads than we are for women not having equal opportunities, payment, or treatment in their daily lives.
Our appearances, for the most part, are out of our control, but our personalities are not. Although our parents are responsible for the way we look, we are responsible for our actions, words, and characteristics. It's time that we start valuing ourselves for who we are and what we have personally accomplished instead of what we look like compared to others.
The media will never be able to have an accurate physical representation of all "real women" because no woman is the same as another. Even if we start to add bigger women into television and advertisements, every size, race, hair color, and physical feature would still have to be represented to fairly represent the American population.
Maybe we have more in common with the women represented in the media than we thought. Instead of thinking of the lack of physical similarities, let's try thinking of the qualities we share. Is she strong, kind-hearted, or thoughtful? Is she a friend, daughter, or a sister? Does she like ice cream as much as you do? Does she enjoy watching cat or dog videos on Facebook? She is a real woman too, and so is anyone who calls herself a woman.
Although compliments about appearances are still nice, next time, if you really want to compliment a woman, call her intelligent instead of calling her pretty; call her kind-hearted instead of calling her skinny; tell her when she made your day, not just when you like her eyeshadow.
