I’ve toyed with the idea of “popularity” for quite some time and I’ve even written an article titled: “Owning Up to my Lack of Popularity.” However, after some more thinking, I decided that I wanted to dive deeper into the subject. I suppose that you could say that I’m obsessed with this idea of “popularity” and that’s fine because you’re right, I sort of am. The idea of this social construct, which has existed for ages, is so intriguing. What exactly constitutes popularity? Is it money, good looks, personality, or the ability to party? What differentiates you from me and me from you on the social pyramid?
Popularity, in my humble opinion, is nothing but an image. It is no substantial thing. We associate popularity with the images that we see and with the persona that someone exemplifies. However, that’s the key word: “exemplifies.” What we see is merely an example. It's only a portion of the whole story. Popularity has never been about the bigger picture.
Popularity is often associated with affluence and the idea of “perfection.”
I will gladly be the first to tell you that all of the money in the world cannot buy happiness. Money, wealth, affluence, and the elite are all things that we associate with those who are popular. We see the things that money can buy: the clothes, the makeup, the cars, the vacations, the houses, the lifestyle. However, the one thing that money cannot buy is fulfillment. Money cannot buy an exterminator who will eliminate all of your problems. Money cannot fix a broken home and it can't mend a broken heart. Money is nothing but a band-aid.
Band-aids are great to put on top of a wound. With a band-aid, everything appears to be held in place. However, every now and then, the band-aid comes loose and, when that happens, you’re reminded of what’s underneath. You're reminded that something there is not-so-good. You acknowledge it, briefly, and then quickly replace the worn-out band-aid with a new one. The cycle repeats. Money is that band-aid.
We associate popularity with the band-aid. It's the band-aid that allows the idea of “perfection” to be constructed. No one ever thinks below the surface, about what may be underneath and how bad things may actually be. People have a tendency to think that money voids all problems. Partying and living the “high life” fulfills you. Owning expensive clothes fulfills you. Living in a mansion fulfills you. That really isn’t the case. Poor or rich, uncool or popular, everyone has their own demons.
Life is short. If a certain image, a false image, constitutes “popularity,” know that I don’t have the time to paint an intricate portrait. I don't have the time to carry that image around with me wherever I go. Glorifying my life is not something that I feel the need to do because I’d much rather show others the quirky, unpolished, messy, screwed up, sensitive, anxious, funny, honest, loving, and kind self who I am. I want people to know me and like me for me.
While I don’t plan on telling every person who I meet my deepest, darkest secrets, I don’t see the need to give a false impression of who I am. I don’t see the need to pretend that everything is OK when it’s not. Not a soul on this planet has been, is, or ever will be perfect, so why in the world would I want to pretend that I am the one person who is? God knows that I’m no Saint.
