Those People: Serial Killers Come In Pairs

Those People: Serial Killers Come In Pairs

Three people, two serial killers, one unexpected friendship

Daisy Trauff was in the middle of cutting holes across her live neighbor’s body when she heard a knock on the door.

“Shit,” she mumbled, wiping some blood off her cheek. Her neighbor tried to scream, but Daisy Trauff kicked his head and he was quiet. Daisy Trauff then gently covered the body with a plastic tarp and called out, “One moment!” She ran to the bathroom, washed her hands, and dried her face; no blood was left on her body after she threw her smock into the shower and pulled the curtain. She flushed the toilet to be safe and rushed to her guest.

There was a suave looking man leaning on the door frame who looked up when Daisy Trauff opened the door.

“Greetings friend! I am looking for one Daisy Trauff.”

“Present. Whom, may I ask, is asking?”

“My name is Simon Hauser.”

“The Quiet Killer??” Daisy Trauff’s eyes went wide at the sight of the inspiration for her current occupation.

“In the flesh.” Simon Hauser was used to fame amongst fellow serial killers. He took the exclamation with a shrug and a knowing smile.

“Oh man! You’re an icon, sir. Your work is absolutely legendary.”

“Hate to brag, but what can I say? It’s a gift.”
“Come in come in! I’m actually in the middle of a project right now.” Daisy Trauff stepped aside and Simon Hauser entered the apartment, surveying the slight mess that was Mr. Moore, the neighbor.

“Very nice! I must say, I’m impressed.” Daisy Trauff felt a surge of pride at her idol’s praise.

“Please don’t think me rude, Mr. Hauser, but what brings you here? Surely you must have more important people to see.”

“Dear Ms. Trauff, I’m here to visit you! I’ve heard so many great things about your work and I thought, ‘I just have to see this woman myself!’”

Daisy Trauff lifted a hand to her heart, truly touched. “Mr. Hauser, I must say it is an honor you think so highly of me.” At that moment, Daisy Trauff’s neighbor woke up, and began to shriek and thrash. “Please be quiet, Mr. Moore. Can’t you see I have company?”

“Ha ha,” Simon Hauser chuckled. “It is alright. I understand how some victims can be.” Simon Hauser, The Quiet Killer, kicked Mr. Moore right in the gaping hole under his left rib. Silently, of course. Mr. Moore fell into a pleasant blackout.

“Would you like anything to eat or drink, Mr. Hauser?”

“Oh no, I’m alright thank you. If you don’t mind, Ms. Trauff, I would love to help you finish off Mr. Moore here.”

“Of course! By all means, make yourself comfortable.”
“Such a polite hostess you are, Ms. Trauff,” Daisy Trauff’s guest replied, removing his jacket and pulling on a second smock that had been hanging on a nearby hook. Wordlessly, he picked up the axe that had been propped up against Daisy Trauff’s couch and hacked open Mr. Moore’s skull. Daisy Trauff was in awe, watching Simon Hauser take each swing with the same wonder of a young child at their first baseball game.

Once Mr. Moore, the neighbor, was completely disemboweled, Daisy Trauff began clapping. She wiped a tear from the corner of her eye as Simon Hauser glowingly accepted the praise. He then removed the smock and wrapped up the remains of Mr. Moore.

Simon Hauser approached his hostess and asked, “May I trouble you for a cup of coffee, Ms. Trauff?”

“Would be my pleasure, Mr. Hauser.” The two serial killers began to share their favorite stories over coffee as if they were old friends catching up after a good deal of time apart.

“Now don’t take this the wrong way, Mr. Hauser, but sometimes your clean up is a little messy. This is just something I personally have observed.”

“No hard feelings, Ms. Trauff. I know, it is a flaw of mine to get a little lackadaisical coming off of a high. You understand, right?”
“Completely, Mr. Hauser. Please let it be known that if you ever need any help, give me a call. I am notorious for leaving a spotless sight, which I believe is why it has taken my work so long to be noticed.”

“I would like nothing more than a friendship like that with you, Ms. Trauff.”

“Here, Mr. Hauser,” Daisy Trauff said, grabbing a pen and a pad of paper from the drawer next to her. She wrote out her number and handed it to her new friend.

“Well, Ms. Trauff,” said Simon Hauser, The Quiet Killer. “I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship.”

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What Your Hogwarts House Says About You

Get yourself sorted and find out where you belong in the world of witchcraft and wizardry.

Sorting at Hogwarts is a big deal. Being sorted into a house is essentially being placed into a family while you are away from home learning about witchcraft and wizardry. Your house is made up of the people you will live with, go to classes with, play Quidditch with and everything in between. You basically spend 24/7 with them. Your Hogwarts house is your home away from home.

When you get sorted into a house, it is based on your personality traits. The people in your house are typically like-minded people who display the same characteristics as you.

When you’re a first year at Hogwarts, the minute you set foot in the castle you are swept into the Great Hall to have the ancient Sorting Hat placed on your head. This Sorting Hat decides which “family” you’ll be spending your seven years with.

For some, it is very obvious which house they will be in, due to certain personality traits they possess. For others, they may exemplify traits that fit a multitude of houses and are uncertain where they may end up.

To find out where you belong, you can take the official "Harry Potter" Sorting Hat quiz at For all you muggles out there, these are the characteristics that the houses possess and what your house says about you:

Gryffindor: The house of the brave, loyal, courageous, adventurous, daring and chivalrous. Those who stand up for others are typically Gryffindors. Brave-hearted is the most well-known Gryffindor characteristic, and Gryffindors are also known for having a lot of nerve.

Gryffindors are people who hold a multitude of qualities alongside the ones listed, making them a very well-rounded house. People who are Gryffindors are often people who could fit nicely into another house but choose to tell the sorting hat they want Gryffindor (there's that bravery). "Do what is right" is the motto Gryffindors go by.

Being a Gryffindor means that you're probably the adventurous and courageous friend, and you are usually known for doing what is right.

Ravenclaw: The house is known for their wisdom, intelligence, creativity, cleverness and knowledge. Those who value brains over brawn can be found here. Ravenclaws often tend to be quite quirky as well. "Do what is wise" is the motto they strive to follow.

Though Ravenclaws can be know-it-alls sometimes, they most likely do know what the wisest decision is.

If you are known for being the quirky friend, the smartest in the group or just great at making wise decisions, you're definitely a Ravenclaw.

Hufflepuff: This house values hard work, dedication, fair play, patience, and loyalty. Hufflepuff’s are known for being just and true. "Do what is nice" is their motto.

Hufflepuff is known as the “nice house” and believes strongly in sparing peoples feelings and being kind. This is not to say that Hufflepuffs aren't smart or courageous. Hufflepuffs just enjoy making others happy and tend to be more patient towards people.

If you ever find that you are too nice for your own good and cannot bear to hurt someone’s feelings, congratulations, you are a Hufflepuff.

Slytherin: This is the house of the cunning, prideful, resourceful, ambitious, intelligent, and determined. Slytherin's love to be in charge and crave leadership. "Do what is necessary" is the motto of this house.

Slytherin is a fairly well-rounded house, similar to the other houses. They are loyal to those that are loyal to them just as Gryffindors are and are intelligent as Ravenclaws.

Slytherin house as a whole is not evil, despite how many dark wizards come out of this house. That is merely based on the choices of those wizards (so if your friend is a Slytherin, don’t judge, it doesn’t mean they are mean people). Slytherins do, however, have a tendency to be arrogant or prideful. This is most likely due to the fact that everyone in Slytherin is exceedingly proud to be there.

What Hogwarts house you’re in says a lot about the person you are, the traits you possess and how you may act in some situations. But in the end, your house is really just your home that is always there for you. Always.

Cover Image Credit: Warner Bros Pictures

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10 Places From Movies And TV You Can Visit In Real Life

It's like stepping into Hollywood!


I am constantly so enamored by the world of Hollywood and by going to visit places I have seen on screen. It's always such an unreal feeling to see where my favorite pieces of entertainment were shot. Here are 10 places from some of our favorite movies to see and visit in the real world!

The High School from "10 Things I Hate About You"

If you have ever wanted to dance on the same stairs as Heath Ledger or just stand in the same courtyard as Julia Stiles then you're in luck! Along the water in Tacoma, Washington, Stadium High School is located which was used both inside and out as the high school from one of the greatest teen movies of all time. This school is massive and so beautiful it's almost Hogwarts level stunning.

Pacific Coast Academy from  "Zoey 101"

Growing up I always dreamed about going to Pacific Coast Academy and being best friends with Jamie Lynn Spears and one of those things can (kinda) become a reality! Located in Malibu is a beautiful campus called Pepperdine University and it is the school they used to shoot scenes of Zoey and the gang at PCA. It is a christian based college and is prestigious in it's own right so if unlike me you are smart enough you can live out my dreams.

Central City Police Department from "The Flash"

Have you ever wanted to show up to Detective Joe West's place of work? Well head to the Vancouver City Hall in Vancouver, Canada and you will recognize your surroundings as the Central City Police Department! If you are lucky enough to show up on a filming day, you might even seen the man himself — Barry Allen.

Forks High School from The Twilight Saga

Personally, I am more invested in Bella and Jacob but for all my Team Edward ladies (and gentleman) you can visit the real-life school where Bella and Edward first met and their love blossomed into whatever obsessive weird thing it was. They also used the parking lot at this school to film the infamous scene where Edward saves Bella from getting crushed by a car. The school is called Kalama High School and is located in Kalama, Washington

Max And Dani's House from "Hocus Pocus"

Anyone with taste loves the movie Hocus Pocus — that's just facts! And I have some good news for fans of the can visit the infamous Denison house! Located in none other than Salem, Massachusetts you will find this beautiful home where my favorite siblings once lived.

Silent Hill from "Silent Hill"

I will say before talking about this place that visiting it is EXTREMELY dangerous as just like in the movie the town as been burning from below for years and years. This small town is called Centralia and is located Pennsylvania and has a roaring population of about four people.

Hobbiton from "Lord Of The Rings"

I am personally not a fan of Lord of the Rings but I know a lot of people are so I wanted to include this super cool place on the list. If you ever find yourself in New Zealand you can visit Hobbinton from the movies and spend a day living like your favorite characters.

Platform 9 3/4 from the Harry Potter Series

Now this place will unfortunately be packed with muggles of course but you can find it at King's Cross Station in London! If you are anything like me and are obsessed with these magical movies this is a dream destination just don't run too hard at the wall if you're a muggle it will probably end in a concussion.

East High from the High School Musical Saga

Located in Salt Lake City Utah is the real life East High that was used in the filming of all three High School Musical movies. It is my absolute dream to attend this high school and walk the halls of the greatest high school of all time. They used both the outside and inside and the school so every inch of the school will remind you of these great teen movies.

Gus and Hazel's Bench from "The Fault in Our Stars" 

If you ever wanted to visit the site of this kiss between star crossed lovers you're in luck! Located along a canal in Amsterdam is a bench that is clearly marked by all the fault in our stars graffiti. Recreate this cute picture with your significant other and use a quote from the movie — then you'll just win in life.

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