Living in a new place can definitely be scary. You might not know or be close with the people already living there and it may take time to form meaningful connections. Especially if they are people you have never really seen before,
One thing that I have learned about living in a new place, a new environment is to just be as realistic as possible about expectations to fit in. You won't feel 100% comfortable fitting in right away and that is okay. Sometimes, as much as we want to get to a certain destination, we need to give ourselves that much time and space as possible.
The thing with finding comfort in living in a new place with people is, you don't really know when you will actually feel like the place is really your second home. It is easy to find hindrances and moments where we feel like we just want to go and live by ourselves.
I still remember the nights where I would plan out when I would start feeling comfortable and even make a backup plan for possibly finding a new place, if I can't feel that comfortable right away. But the truth is, we are all human and find our own comfort at different paces, different times in our lives. And there is nothing wrong with that. We do our own thing and we will eventually find our way.
The thing about living in a new place is that you feel that the expectations are unexpected. Even though you might know that you will be living with other people and eventually feel settled in, there is always a chance that you won't be able to meet those expectations and feel confident right away. Comfort is something that helps us feel confident in our environment, whether that is at back home, an off campus home, or an academic building we usually go to, to get work done. It's not about the place, but about where we feel the most comfortable.
No one has to feel alone in finding that comfort and solace we need to get through a new school year:
Make a list and outline the things that make you feel uncomfortable about living in the new home: Sometimes, it is important that we get "down to business" with what is making us feel this way. Even though it can be something we think is small and not as important, it can definitely still play a role in affecting how we feel. The list can be made anywhere, on your phone, or in a journal. But preferably, the list should be someplace personal and where only you can see it.
Realize that you WILL find comfort someplace, somewhere eventually: In situations like these, where it leaves us feeling overwhelmed, it is important to take a moment and realize that it's okay if we take our time and really try to find out what makes us comfortable about living in a new place.
Don't make your expectations become your goals: When times are rough, things can't always go the way we want them to. It's important that we separate expectations from goals that are more realistically attainable. We want things to look bright and sunny again, and for us to see things in that light again, we can't make our expectations automatically become a part of our goals.
