If you are anything like me, there are moments in life when your mind is filled with self-doubt. There’s a voice in your head that tells you that you aren’t good enough, that you will not succeed, that this situation is too impossible to fix. That little voice is blatantly lying to you, but it’s hard to push this voice out of your head at times. Here are some ways that I’ve learned that help me squash this voice and focus on my true capabilities:
1. Make a list of the positive qualities you admire about yourself
If you recognize the positive aspects of yourself, you will come to realize that you, in fact, are capable of great things. Everyone has their weaknesses- but everyone also has their strengths. It can be something as little as, “I still hold the door open for people” because even the simplest of actions can show how caring of a person you are. And if you have something about yourself that you think is a negative quality? Identify it, and try to take steps to changing it. Turn your weaknesses into strengths.
2. Listen to your favorite, feel good songs
Music is the answer to most things in life, in my eyes. If you’re feeling down about yourself, listen to your favorite song. I suggest even making a playlist of these songs, so you can quickly access a whole playlist of wonderful lyrics. My suggestion? Take a listen to “Impossible” by Shontelle, or “Fight Song” by Rachel Platten- anything that puts a smile on your face.
3. Save a box of old mementos to look through
I like to save notes, old emails, quotes, and tokens from people that I care about. That way, I can look back at them and see how many people care about me. I have a postcard from my very first best friend, my dried out prom corsage, a piece of paper with my friend’s 6th grade IM screen- name written on it, and many more memories. When I look through this box, I am reminded once again that there are people that think I’m a pretty decent person, so why am I thinking otherwise? It also lifts my spirits, and puts me in an overall better mood.
4. Talk to someone you love
Simply talking to someone you love and voicing your feelings may help erase your self-doubts. For me, I think that talking through things with a friend allows me to express myself and why I’m feeling down about my abilities. It’s important to have that friend that will always support you and try to make you feel better, but who also will call you out when you’re being ridiculous. Sometimes, you need a reality check to realize all of your doubts are insignificant and to help snap out of this mindset.
5. Fake it till you make it
As someone who has been developing self-confidence throughout college, there are times when you have to fake it till you make it. Even when I have doubts about myself, I repeat “I can and I will” to myself over and over until I actually believe it. Self-confidence is not something you’ll develop in a day- it takes time. So until you feel totally confident in yourself, there are times when you’ll need to fake it til you make it. But, that doesn’t mean that you have to cover up your true feelings. It’s okay to feel vulnerable and recognize these insecurities; it’ll help you become more self-aware and a stronger person overall.
I’m not guaranteeing these will work, but for me, these little actions have helped me develop a stronger sense of self, and have helped me snap out of moods when I’m feeling down about myself. Remember, you are loved, and you are important. You are capable of so, so much, and will succeed.
