Celebrate Love This Valentine's Day, Even If You Think It's 'Basic'

Celebrate Love This Valentine's Day, Even If You Think It's 'Basic'

Embrace the basic-ness — and your significant other.

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For a long time, I have thought that Valentine's Day was overrated and over-celebrated, just like a lot of other holidays that Americans tend to turn into a crazy event (St. Patrick's Day, I'm looking at you).

I thought it was an excuse for girls to beg their partners for lavish bouquets and jewelry, and for non-single people to flaunt their relationship statuses on social media. It honestly always seemed kind of... superficial.

However, this year, as the idea of having an actual significant other to celebrate the day with became closer to reality (it isn't anymore, but it still made me think about this), I reanalyzed the holiday with a new perspective.

There's nothing wrong with celebrating love.

Why should some lonely single girl, whining on Facebook about how annoying Valentine's Day is, stop people from celebrating the joy of being with someone you love, or at least care for deeply? Why can't you shower someone with flowers and chocolates because you love them?

Should we only celebrate affection and adoration on this singular day out of the year?

Absolutely not. But picking another landmarked day out of the 365 options to splurge a bit more on dinner, hold hands a little tighter or let lips linger a little longer is nothing to frown upon.

There's always been negativity around enjoying things that large groups of people love — One Direction, Chipotle, Starbucks, Victoria's Secret, etc. — but that shouldn't stop you from enjoying them. Why should a holiday that celebrates love, even if it's not quite what the holiday was intended as, be any different?

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To The Boy Who Will Love Me Next

If you can't understand these few things, leave before things get too involved
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To the boy that will love me next, I need you to know and understand things about me and my past. The things I have been though not only have shaped the person I’ve become, but also sometimes controls my life. In the past I’ve been used, abused, and taken for granted, and I want something real this time. The guys before you were just boys; they didn’t know how to treat me until it was too late. They didn’t understand how to love me, until I broke my own heart. Before you truly decide to love me I want you to understand these things.

When I tell you something, please listen.

I’m my own person, I want to be loved a certain way. If I ask you to come over and watch movies with me please do it, if I ask for you to leave me alone for a few hours because it’s a girl’s night please do it. I don’t just say things to hear my own voice, I say things to you because it’s important to my life and the way I want to be loved. I’m not a needy person when it comes to being loved and cared for, but I do ask for you to do the small things that I am say.

Forgive my past.

My past is not a pretty brick road, it is a highway that has a bunch of potholes and cracks in it. I have a lot of baggage, and most of it you won’t understand. But don’t let my past decided whether you want to love me or not. My past has helped form who I am today, but it does not define who I am. My past experiences might try and make an appearance every once in a while, but I will not go back to that person I once was, I will not return to all that hurt I once went though. When I say those things, I’m telling the complete and honest truth. I relive my past every day, somethings haunt me and somethings are good reminds. But for you to love me, I need you to accept my past, present and future.

I’m just another bro to the other guys.

I have always hung out with boys, I don’t fit in with the girl groups. I have 10 close girlfriends, but the majority of my friends are guy, but don’t let this scare you. If I wanted to be with one of my guy friends I would already be with him, and if you haven’t noticed I don’t want them because I’m with you. I will not lose my friendships with all my guy friends to be able to stay with you. I will not cut off ties because you don’t like my guy friends. I have lost too many buddies because of my ex-boyfriends and I promised myself I wouldn’t do that again. If you don’t like how many guy friends I have you can leave now. Don’t bother trying to date me if you can accept the fact I’m just another bro.

I might be a badass, but I actually have a big heart.

To a lot of people I come off to be a very crazy and wild girl. I will agree I can be crazy and wild, but I’m more than that. I’m independent, caring, responsible, understanding, forgiving, and so such more type of woman. Many people think that I’m a badass because I don’t take any negatively from anyone. Just like we learned when we were younger, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.” Most people can’t do that in today’s world, so I stick up for myself and my friends. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me, or their option on how I live my life. The only thing I care about is being able to make myself happy. Even though I’m an independent woman, understand that I do have a big heart. Honesty when I truly care for someone I will do just about anything they ask, but don’t take advantage of this. Once you take advantage of this part of me, all respect will be lost for you.

I’m hard to love.

Sometimes I want to be cuddle and get attention, and sometimes I don’t want you to talk to me for a couple hours. Sometimes I want you to take me out for a nice meal, but sometimes I want a home cooked meal. Every day is different for me, sometimes I change my mind every hour. My mood swings are terrible on certain days, and on those days you should probably just ignore me. I’m not easy to love, so you’ll either be willing to find a way to love me, or you’ll walk out like so many others have.

I’m scared.

I’m scared to love someone again. I’ve been hurt, heartbroken, and beat to the ground in my past relationships. I want to believe you are different, I want to hope things will truly work out, but every relationship has always ended up the same way. I’m scared to trust someone, put my whole heart into them, just to be left and heartbroken again. I sick and tired of putting my whole body and soul into someone for them to just leave when it is convenient for them. If you want to love me, understand it won’t be easy for me to love you back.

When “I’m done.”

When I say “I’m done” I honestly don’t mean that I’m done. When I say that it means I need and want you to fight for me, show me why you want to be with me. I need you to prove that I’m worth it and there’s no one else but me. If I was truly done, I would just walk away, and not come back. So if I ever tell you, “I’m done,” tell me all the reasons why I’m truly not done.

For the boy who will love me next, the work is cut out for you, you just have to be willing to do it. I’m not like other girls, I am my own person, and I will need to be treated as such. For the boy that will love me next, don’t bother with me unless you really want to be with me. I don’t have time to waste on you if you aren’t going to try and make something out of us. To the boy who will love me next, the last thing I would like to say is good luck, I have faith in you.

Cover Image Credit: Danielle Balint

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Whether Your Perpetually Single Or Married AF, Here Are 5 Easy Things To Do This Valentine's Day

Make the perfect day even more special.

JBoyd
JBoyd
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The day that is full of love, smiles, and red faces. Valentine's Day! This is such a beautiful day because there are many people showcasing their love for one another, or people embracing to tell their biggest secret to someone (their crush). This day is one of my favorite holidays and I love how people make others feel especially special on this day. There are many things to do on Valentine's Day, but if you're single or in a relationship, I have the perfect things to do.

1. The Stars.

https://unsplash.com/photos/Q_RBVFFXR_g

This may seem corny, but taking the time to sit outside at 7 p.m. to look at the stars is lovely. Having that time to communicate with your significant other is relaxing and peaceful. This is a great way to enjoy each other's company and to cherish a moment of relaxation.

2. Yum, Num, Yum.

https://unsplash.com/photos/JHUkH7nZvTQ

Of course, I was going to tell you to go out to eat. Taking that time to eat dinner with your significant other is important. You can have that moment in time to just express why you love that person and you can do it over a great dinner. If you're not feeling anything fancy, choose a different type of scenery. Instead of prime ribs and asparagus, go get some good 'ole fashioned wings, ribs or a juicy burger. Step outside of the box.

3. Game Night.

https://unsplash.com/photos/mf_3yZnC6ug

Having a game night with your significant other is not traditional at all, that's why you should do it. Monopoly, Chess, Checkers, Dance Dance Revolution. These are all great games to play with your significant other. Having that time to laugh and relieve stress with one another can really help you mentally. It may seem childish, but it is something different and is not a part of the status quo.

4. If you're single,  mingle.

https://unsplash.com/photos/e3OUQGT9bWU

For all my single souls, it's okay not being in a relationship on Valentine's Day. There're still things for you to do. You can go out with your other single friends an enjoy their company. You can even try speed dating. Movie night by yourself isn't too bad neither, I've done it before and it is quite peaceful. Treating your mom, dad or siblings is not ideal, but it will make their day. Valentine's Day can be spent with anyone, not just someone you have "feelings" for.

5. MOVIES!

https://unsplash.com/photos/evlkOfkQ5rE

There will probably be love movie marathons playing on TV the entire week of Valentine's Day. Enjoy a "chick flick" with your girls or guys. I know it may seem lame, but movie night is the best type of night to spend with family & friends. One of my favorite movies is Valentine's Day. It's such an awesome movie that focuses on a range of people and their Valentine's Day.

Valentine's Day is the time to show everyone you care for that you love them. Whether you show them in small gestures or big gestures. You can give people thank you cards or send them a basket of edible arrangement. This is the day of love. Let this be the day that you embrace love, in every aspect that you can embrace it in.

JBoyd
JBoyd

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