In 2016, there are so many gender identities and pronouns that people identify with. There are not "real" and "fake" pronouns as some people would lead you to believe, but that obviously doesn't mean that we don't employ language to do what we need it to do. English is already a conglomerate of bits and pieces from all sorts of languages, and it is ever evolving to meet the needs of its users (think "selfie" being added to the dictionary). New pronouns such as ze/zir and singular they/them are being used by people who don't identify with the he/him or she/her binary. Sometimes this pronoun use represents a non-binary gender identity, but the use of gender neutral pronouns does not equal being non-binary, and being non-binary doesn't equal using gender neutral pronouns.
However, regardless of why someone chooses gender neutral pronouns, using them to refer to the person is important. One Salem College student, Krys, was quoted as saying the use of their desired pronouns makes them "feel valued and respected as a human being." And that it "matches my identity" as a genderfluid person. Another person, Maranda, said, "it makes me feel like less of a label and more of a person."
One of the reasons I have heard as to why you don't have to use the correct pronouns is that it is grammatically incorrect. Well, I'll be the first to tell you that it isn't, and even if it was, people are more important than a minor grammatical "error" (also, as I said before, English is constantly evolving. If you can accept "selfie" as a real word but can't accept using "they" to make someone feel comfortable, you might want to re-evaluate.) Another reason that I've heard is that it "makes me uncomfortable to use singular they or other gender-neutral pronouns." That's great. You know what makes other people uncomfortable? Being misgendered. Also, there is a really high likelihood that you use singular "they" all the time in regular conversation ("Someone left their phone in the bathroom. I hope they realize it and come back for it.") and have no qualms about it.
Changing something that has always been one way in your life can be challenging. No one should expect you to change how you speak overnight, but if someone uses a certain pronouns, you should work on using whatever pronouns they have chosen to refer to themselves. If you care about people, you have to also care about their identity and their pronouns. If you don't know of anyone who uses pronouns other than she/her or he/him, work on accepting that gender is a spectrum not a binary and people that exist in a grey space of gender identity still deserve respect. Become a safe place for people regardless of gender identity and pronouns. Make the world a better place one "they" at a time.
