The silent treatment | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

6 Ways For Men To Understand Women

The introduction. Let's face it, there's WAY more than 6.

1026
6 Ways For Men To Understand Women

We know we're confusing, but hopefully this helps you understand us a little better.

"I have nothing to wear"

Giphy

We realize that we have a ton of clothes in our closets to choose from. We know that some things are super similar. We know that there are some things we wear all the time and other things that we NEVER wear. Regardless of the Go-Tos or "I'm saving this for a 'special occasion'" (which will probably never happen), there's always an excuse. When we say we have nothing to wear, it means that we don't have anything that we WANT to wear.

This contributes to us taking SO long to get ready. Whether it's a date, a night out with the girls, hanging out with a group, or just another Tuesday, we never have anything to wear. We try to dress to match our mood, but that's still not a guarantee. It never is. If we try something on, thinking that it'll work, there's always something wrong with it SO it goes in the reject pile. As the pile grows, we reach the "I have nothing to wear" stage.

And just to make things more complicated and annoying, we go back to the first outfit we tried on and call it good -OR resort to the Go-Tos that we wear WAY too much- (at least I normally do). We waste all that time and effort and there's usually no way to get around it.

Periods

Giphy

Guys, let me explain to you how a period works.

Every month, our Uterus starts decorating a nursery. "Just wanted to let you know I have everything prepared for the baby! The nursery looks great and I picked out this pretty wallpaper and I'm gonna read stories to it every night!"

Then we come around and say "Oh.. There's not going to be a baby this month.."

Uterus: ......

Us: "Oh god, please no"

Uterus: .... *trashes everything* *rips off the wallpaper* *screams like an angry baboon*

THIS gentlemen, is what we have to go through. Every time we get a cramp, it's basically our uterus stabbing us with broken pieces of the crib and twisting it. This is why we double over. This is why some (maybe most) women cry during their periods. Our uterus throws a freaking temper tantrum when we don't get pregnant.

By the time the uterus gets tired and forgives us, it goes back to setting up a new nursery with upmost excitement. And when we don't get pregnant, the cycle repeats.

Wanna know what to do? Don't make us do anything. Pamper us. Most women like to eat chocolate, so do that (for some reason, that doesn't work for me, but oh well). Have the heating pad ready to go. Ice cream. Even while we look disgusting, reassure us. The uterus' temper tantrum makes us question everything so be ready for that.

But God help you if you say the wrong thing. Most of the time, we don't know what that wrong thing will be, so tread lightly. Just do NOT say ANYTHING about PMSing. Our uterus will hear that and give us some of that hateful energy to rip you apart.

You have been warned.

Unsolicited dick pics

Giphy

Just don't. Despite what you think, they are NOT aesthetically pleasing.

When a girl actually asks for them and/or agrees to swap nudes, that's the only time it's okay. But if they're anything like me, the pictures still won't do anything for them. I guess it's to make y'all feel wanted and appreciated? I don't know.

If you send unsolicited dick pics, there's a pretty good chance that her girlfriends will see the pictures so be warned.

Hoodie Theft

Giphy

Sorry guys, there's no way to get around this one. If your girl takes your hoodie, you probably won't get it back.

And if you try to out-smart us by getting two of the exact same hoodie so both of us have one, that won't work either. You foolish mortals think we won't take the second-twinning hoodie too? HA.

You: "Where do you want to eat?' Her: "I don't know"

Giphy

I HAVE YOUR SOLUTION.

Instead of asking your girl where she wants to eat, MAKE HER GUESS where you're taking her. Her first guess is where y'all are going.

The code has been cracked and most girls don't even realize this sneaky trick (unless they've seen the Twitter meme).

The silent treatment

Giphy

Honestly... when we're giving you the silent treatment, USUALLY it's because we want you to figure out what you did wrong for yourselves. But it makes this difficult because sometimes we don't even know the reason. Stupid? I know. But we're girls. What do you expect?

We're waiting for you to come up with a solution to whatever problem we think you caused. Because we're right. Even when we're wrong, we're right.

You've probably found with personal experience that you've always found a way to screw it up and you don't even know how. She freaks out for almost no reason and usually never shares why she's so pissed off.

If you don't wanna take the chance on finding the solution because of even the slightest fear of making it worse SOMEHOW, just chill. Spend time with her, don't do anything stupid on your phone, don't play games online with the guys- just spend time with her. It'll let her know that even though she's freaking out for probably no reason, that you still care. Because what'll happen if you leave? "OH SO YOU'RE JUST GONNA GET UP AND LEAVE?"

You guys are honestly in a lose-lose situation and I feel for y'all so much. If you know her well enough to leave and let her calm down, then go for it- at your own risk. Just handle the situation calmly and be like "if you need anything, just call or text me. I'll be there."

DO NOT TELL HER TO CALM DOWN, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

Just give her space SOMEHOW and let her chill. She'll more than likely be over it the next day.

I know this whole thing is giving you mixed messages on what to do, but honestly we don't really know what we want you guys to do, so there you go.

This may help, this may not, but it's a decent start. :)

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Lifestyle

The Great Christmas Movie Debate

"A Christmas Story" is the star on top of the tree.

816
The Great Christmas Movie Debate
Mental Floss

One staple of the Christmas season is sitting around the television watching a Christmas movie with family and friends. But of the seemingly hundreds of movies, which one is the star on the tree? Some share stories of Santa to children ("Santa Claus Is Coming to Town"), others want to spread the Christmas joy to adults ("It's a Wonderful Life"), and a select few are made to get laughs ("Elf"). All good movies, but merely ornaments on the Christmas tree of the best movies. What tops the tree is a movie that bridges the gap between these three movies, and makes it a great watch for anyone who chooses to watch it. Enter the timeless Christmas classic, "A Christmas Story." Created in 1983, this movie holds the tradition of capturing both young and old eyes for 24 straight hours on its Christmas Day marathon. It gets the most coverage out of all holiday movies, but the sheer amount of times it's on television does not make it the greatest. Why is it,
then? A Christmas Story does not try to tell the tale of a Christmas miracle or use Christmas magic to move the story. What it does do though is tell the real story of Christmas. It is relatable and brings out the unmatched excitement of children on Christmas in everyone who watches. Every one becomes a child again when they watch "A Christmas Story."

Keep Reading...Show less
student thinking about finals in library
StableDiffusion

As this semester wraps up, students can’t help but be stressed about finals. After all, our GPAs depends on these grades! What student isn’t worrying about their finals right now? It’s “goodbye social life, hello library” time from now until the end of finals week.

1. Finals are weeks away, I’m sure I’ll be ready for them when they come.

Keep Reading...Show less
Christmas tree
Librarian Lavender

It's the most wonderful time of the year! Christmas is one of my personal favorite holidays because of the Christmas traditions my family upholds generation after generation. After talking to a few of my friends at college, I realized that a lot of them don't really have "Christmas traditions" in their family, and I want to help change that. Here's a list of Christmas traditions that my family does, and anyone can incorporate into their family as well!

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

The 5 Phases Of Finals

May the odds be ever in your favor.

2082
Does anybody know how to study
Gurl.com

It’s here; that time of year when college students turn into preschoolers again. We cry for our mothers, eat everything in sight, and whine when we don’t get our way. It’s finals, the dreaded time of the semester when we all realize we should have been paying attention in class instead of literally doing anything else but that. Everyone has to take them, and yes, unfortunately, they are inevitable. But just because they are here and inevitable does not mean they’re peaches and cream and full of rainbows. Surviving them is a must, and the following five phases are a reality for all majors from business to art, nursing to history.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

How To Prepare For The Library: Finals Edition

10 ways to prepare for finals week—beginning with getting to the library.

3311
How To Prepare For The Library: Finals Edition
Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash

It’s that time of year again when college students live at the library all week, cramming for tests that they should have started studying for last month. Preparing to spend all day at the library takes much consideration and planning. Use these tips to help get you through the week while spending an excessive amount of time in a building that no one wants to be in.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments