Try your hand at steering your umbrella through the Chicago wind that will literally sweep you off of your feet! The object is to last the longest without your umbrella flipping inside out. For the experienced Chicago natives, there’s varsity umbrella sailing, which requires you to successfully pass through the Jeannie Gang Wind Tunnel!
Do you love jumping from tiny cobblestone to tiny cobblestone in a valiant but futile attempt to keep your nice new shoes dry? Then try the puddle jump! Based off of the Olympic sport of long jump, puddle jump combines a series of long and short jumps, hops, skips, and stretches to pass through a small pond that definitely wasn’t there earlier!
Have you ever thought to yourself, “Running is great and all, but I just wish there was more water everywhere”? Then AquaRun is the spring sport for you! Simply buy a pair of nice rainboots and fearlessly jog through every puddle in sight, splashing everyone around you!
The 1.5-mile AquaRun with Umbrella
If you’re the type of person who is always running late to class on days when it’s raining, then you should be well trained for this epic struggle of wind, rain, and trying to get to class on time because attendance counts as part of the grade. The key is to reach the class with the lowest time. Seconds are added for umbrella flips, audible cursing of the weather, classes, college and/or the specific class in front of children or prospective students, noticeable tears, and splashing/knocking over the surrounding competitors.
This week long marathon is, in a very real sense, the very essence of UChicago spring sports. A marathon for only the strongest of the strong, competitors spend a week pouring through piles of textbooks without sleep, run to test their skills at “exams”, and return to continue their struggle. This is not a sport for the weak of heart, as it is challenging physically, mentally, and emotionally. Competitors emerge triumphant, broken, or broken about how triumphant they feel despite their plummeting GPAs.
More competitive for first-year students, this sport consists of tossing as many resumes and cover letters to as many employers as possible from December to June. Points are rewarded only if the employers catch the papers; if they sidestep them, send a kind rejection, or offer up a confused look at why you would even bother to apply to such a prestigious institution as a first-year, no points are given. The winner is the first to have an employer accept their offer. Last place goes to the person who is avoided by all the employers. Consolation prize: Netflix.